After so many blog posts about what's wrong with the American gay porn industry, namely the racism and ageism, there came a time where I needed to make a choice. I could either (a)play bobble-head doll, and act as if these problems don't exist, (b)continue fighting for change by way of my writing to round up the many people who agree with me, or (c)realize that I had better things and enough talent to do more with my life. So I chose to practice what I preach with all the times I've said in blog posts of how "it's only porn", and decided on choice (c).
My making that choice doesn't change my acknowledging the problems still being there. It's the reason I still advise the non-racist public to send their message by boycotting the purchase of American gay porn. Now, if you find a site that gives you a nice free download of American gay porn, have at it. But delete it when you're done, because another scene or movie with just as many homogenized White guys or Blacks guys as thugs is bound to come along soon after. So there's no need to clutter your computer's hard drive with so much of the same thing. Hence why my latest statement for my "Write That Down" label is:
American gay porn is NOT worth buying. With all the racism and ageism displayed in it, all it's good for is 1 free download, 1 jerk-off, and 1 deletion.
Now, should I return to American gay porn in any capacity, that will be a clear sign that an American gay porn movie has come along where this thought should not be applied to.
Lastly, I will close by saying that due to their recent unions with Cocky Boys and Corbin Fisher, Bel-Ami is quickly becoming a European company I'm about to advise the same action on.
I'm not sure I understand your position on ageism. As a 64 yo chubby bear daddy, I realize that there are many gay men who consider me to be a troll. That's fine. I believe everyone has a right to enjoy porn performed by actors they can objectify to fulfill their individual taste for fantasies. I myself am not turned on by men like me--I'm attracted to my opposite type: young, smooth, slender and ethnic. Lucky for me I find many men who are my type who find me attractive. I don't believe we can control our tastes in porn any more than we can control our sexual orientation. It's an exercise in futility--mental masturbation if you will--to attempt to dictate the tastes of others any more than we can control our own sexual preferences. As my wife (who knows I'm bisexual) says, "There's a lid for every pot."ReplyDelete
If you're serious about breaking down ageist & sexist barriers, make a porn flick with me. We can call it "Beauty and the Beef!"
Carolus, I am quite disturbed by your comment. You seem to have become complacent in this rule that says, "It is what it is", so you allow and settle for anything that is thrown your way from the porn industry.ReplyDelete
I BEG TO DIFFER!
Your saying you don't believe we can control our taste in porn any more than we can control our orientation is FIRST OF ALL, an unfair comparison. Our orientation is our INDIVIDUAL NATURE. Our taste in porn however is to a degree controlled by our environment. For instance, I've come to realize that many people into some degree of S & M, if you talk to them long enough, you will find that they are people with some form of abuse in their background, and have carried that abuse into their sexual lives. OR a more personal story, my racism against other Black men stopped me from admiring the beauty of Black men in a sexual way.
And just as I didn't settle for my racism against other Black men, because I taught myself to love who and what I am, you need to do the same so you will admire the beauty of males your own age. THEN you will understand my position on ageism in this matter.
This brings me to addressing your proposition about doing a porn flick. While I appreciate you admiration, my peace with myself and my age makes me go for guys who are mentally and/or physically NOT too much younger or older than myself. So such a porn flick will not happen. For my talk about breaking down the ageist barriers is showing beautiful older men revelling in the beauty of men their own age, instead of the "daddy" scenario that the porn industry shoves down consumers' throats.
I'm a 64 yo medical doctor and sex therapist. I've had sex with more than 1,000 men and women of every race, religion, nationality and sexual preference, ranging in age from 18 to 88, and I've enjoyed it all. The only reason the porn industry makes the DVDs you evidently find objectionable is because people buy them. People buy them because they enjoy them. I enjoy being the daddy. Would you deny me that? If so, I submit you are the ageist. The words control freak, thought police and Nazi come to mind. You have so much to offer the world; so much pleasure to give. I hope you don't wear yourself out jousting at windmills in a match you can never win. As Freud said, "Human beings are polymorphously perverse." The tsunami of human nature is against you.ReplyDelete
Yes, studios make these movies to please people taste, EVEN IF THOSE TASTE ARE NOT JUST OF THE SEXUALLY SANE, BUT THE SEXUALLY PERVERSE AS WELL.ReplyDelete
Now, you accuse me of being an ageist. I like being with MEN who may be older than me, but NOT old enough to father me by their mental and/or physical state, and the reason for that is because I DO NOT have "daddy-issues" that have become sexual. Nor do I desire to be with a guy much younger than me who I can father mentally and/or physically, because I don't want to cater to their "daddy-issues". I am content with my own age enough that I want men who act just as mature, with my high energy. Now if that solace with my own age makes me an ageist in your book, then as a sex therapist, you are overcharging your patients.
Lastly, the flaw with your attack on my stands on this matter is that you are twisting my words around, because I already stated my issue of ageism in the industry. That issue being that it doesn't show older men who take care of their bodies, and are content with men their own age who do the same, and there are a great many who are.
And I know I have a lot to offer. Which is why I am ofering this reality that you are taking offense to. And I am not by any means wearing myself out. And you forced my hand in throwing this at you, but the proof is in the fact of how most American males my age don't look this youthful without a gazillion beauty products and operations, and kill themselves in the gym to get anywhere near my physique. I do it all naturally - meaning being at peace with myself in who, what, and where I am in my life.
It sounds like you're in a good place and I'm happy for you. I just wonder what your attitude is towards men like me who have not taken care of themselves. I weigh 300 pounds and am in terrible physical condition. What age range do you consider appropriate? Maybe plus or minus 10 years? What if a person doesn't appear to be his stated age? I was once seduced by a 17 yo who told me he was 20. He was fat, hairy and bald & could have passed for 30. My b/f is 60 but has the body of a 15 yo. We love the daddy/son roleplay. Does that make us bad people?ReplyDelete
I can't have an attitude towards people who don't take care of themselves, because it is YOUR responsibility. So the attitude is for one to have about oneself. Whoever slacks off on that, that's on them, AND THE SAME GOES FOR ME IF I DO IT TO MYSELF.ReplyDelete
I have a line that I try not to cross regarding age. I try to say that I won't go for anyone I'm old enough to father or who is old enough to father me, so I try to make my limit plus or minus 12 years. Now, I never make the 1st move when I suspect they're anywhere near that young. However, because of my young look, I do seem to get approached by guys who are more than 12 years younger. So I hope for the best that they are mature beyond their years. Such has not been the case so far, as in the case of the 26 year-old dipshit I was recently seeing.
I will admit that I would feel guilty giving into their advances if I didn't look or show myself to be physical shape that appears to be so close to their age.
Now if your boyfriend is 60 with the body of a 15 year-old, then great. If you want to do the daddy/son roleplay, have fun with the fantasy. I'm a great admirer of fantasy. It's when you step outside that fantasy that indicators of greater inner-issues present themselves. Remember that commercial's tag-line, "Love the skin you're in".
bel-ami has always been a sort of aryan porn company but citebeur is of a different kind (european french) and i do think michael lucas has always used a multi-ethnic castReplyDelete
In regards to Michael Lucas using a multi-ethnic cast, they may be multi-ethnic, but they are not often enough multi-colored. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE. The lack of dark in the color scheme in his cast should be a problem for any non-racist person, especially when he is based in a multi-ethnic, multi-cultural, and multi-colored mecca like New York City of all places.