Holding The Balls at Bingo-A-Gogo

It's been awhile, but this should be fun.

On January 10th, I'll be the guest caller at a special Men of Color Bingo-A-Gogo at The Cock.

When I said that it's been awhile, it because if you've followed me since my porn days, then you might recall me being a guest caller at Will Clark's Porno Bingo a good number of times. Before my porn career by winning his Porn Idol contest, as well as since my retirement from the industry. So the idea of me holding balls in my hand is nothing new.

And FYI, I'm talking about Bingo balls. Thinking otherwise just goes to show....

Well, bring your nasty mind where it will be greatly appreciated. Especially since you'll probably need the release after a hard day's work. So let some good drinks by your bartender Franco and $1 per Bingo card give you a chance to win prizes to enhance your sex life on that night, and a good number beyond.

I wondering, might you find this to be an even better pick-me up if perhaps I read some of my erotic poetry to get you in the mood. Or give some sexual advice that you'll soon want to find a lucky someone to take home from the party afterwards, Thiccc to try it on. Even more so hoping to put the "happy" in Happy Hour, I will be stripping down as this Happy Hour event progresses.

Keep in mind this will be happening on a Wednesday night...HUMP DAY! And you know I'm all about inspiring some healthy & hearty Hump Day humping.

So I hope to see you there. 😉

BINGO-A-GOGO

 January 10th @ The Cock

93 2nd Avenue

(bet. E. 5th & 6th Streets)

From 7 - 10 pm

$1 Bingo cards

Happy Hour 2-4-1 drinks

Followed by Thiccc at 11 pm

Then maybe you'll stick around for....

Our friends over at @gutsnyc put together a sweet flyer for when they invade the DJ booth for the Jan. 10th edition of #THICCC only at @thecock.nyc It's our monthly get down for guys of color and all the folks who love them. Come thru and hear some great music, drink stiff drinks, and come play with some hot men. My host John John and I will be around yo make sure you have a great time. We'll have some thiccc and sexy GOGO men from all backgrounds shaking asses and swinging dicks all. night long. Save the date Jan 10th at 11! No cover before 11PM/ $5 After Coat and clothes check available. 93 2nd Ave - 2nd Ave between 6th and 5th #verse #bottoms #tops #dirty #gaysex #latenight #poppers #gaymen #gayfollow #nycnightlife #gaycruising

A post shared by Francesco De Marco (@beefyqueer) on Jan 5, 2018 at 11:18am PST

From Porn to Poet, ...Who Would've Predicted?

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Open Mic Exhibitionism, Virginity Giveaway, and Loathing of Clothing

Last year, it was quite disappointing to learn that The Inspired Word was ending Titillating Tongues. Because there are so few events like it in New York City offering a safe space for erotic artist to showcase their work.

Well, I am please to announce that  Titillating Tongues in making a return. Before, it was at Soho Playhouse, then Le Poisson Rouge. Now, it's out of Manhattan, and coming to the Brooklyn speakeasy, Hell Phone.

What's special about this return is that I was introduced to Titillating Tongues by Aimee Herman emailing me an invitation to be a featured performer, and I have been invited to be a featured performer again in this return, but this time by Inspired Word producer, Mike Geffner.

I know I broke new ground there with my debut and various other performances. Some of which included me stripping on the stage, which led to a mention in TimeOut New York. Well, I'm not sure I'll go that far this time around, YET. For I have yet to see the space, and learn what I'm working with. In the meantime, I do hope that if you're in NYC, that you'll come by, and check me and all of the other performers out. And maybe even take part yourself since their is a 15-slot open mic.

With all that said, the only teaser I'm giving are the titles of the poems to be included in my set thus far:

LeNair's Exhibitionist Credo

Overdue Virginity Giveaway

Notches

Strut of No Shame

Loathing of Clothing

So if you're in NYC, I hope to see you all on September 23rd.
Get your tickets HERE. 

New Orgasm: Exploring The Onyx

As some of you may know that I've been blogging for the sex toy company Kiiroo since the end of 2015. Never getting their best known product, the interactive male masturbation sleeve, the Onyx.

Now, if you know my reputation and how I don't associate myself with anything I don't know is good, then me writing for Kiiroo without knowing how well is Onyx works might puzzle you. Well, I can best explain that move by my experience 6 years ago with the sex toy, Real Touch. That experience showed me that the technology for such a device is there, so it would be ludicrous for a company to put their name out there in such high profile if their product can't deliver its claimed features.

Features such as:

• Being interactive with Kiiroo's female vibrator, Pearl. 
• Being intertactive with another Onyx
• Reacting to the actions of some interactive porn websites
• Hand-sensors on top of the device

Such features make this the toy males have been dreaming of since the human male has been traveling away from their sex partners, as well as since they have been masturbating to porn. So why is it that I have been having trouble getting off to using Kiiroo Onyx?

Perhaps a look at my masturbation and orgasm history might explain it.

I've been masturbating with a simple jerk-off since I was 9 or 10 years old. I didn't lose my virginity until I was 30 going on 31, and back then, the orgasm I got from sex was a mental one. The physical orgasm came again from jerking off as masturbation after the sex. I started masturbating with a Fleshlight when they first came out, but my method of masturbation over 95% of the time remained being jerking off. I then played with a Tenga Flip-Hole, and reviewed it with high marks, but reverted back to over 95% jerking off as masturbation. At this point, I didn't see myself able to orgasm during sex until I played with the Aneros prostate massagers my job gave me as a birthday present in 2014, I felt the potential to orgasm by being penetrated, but not touching myself last year, Stopping myself because of how foreign the feeling felt. So I redeemed only recently, by letting myself go during a hot encounter in which (at the old ass age of 45) I ejaculated while being penetrated.

Take note that every masturbation and orgasm experience listed in the previous paragraph had one commonality----either my hand, my crotch, or both were in motion. So now comes this sex toy that I bought where it is marketed (and I can testify as TRUE) to how none of that motion is necessary. All you have to do is stick your dick in, and it's like you've stepped into the porn actor's body. Feeling every sensation (technologically possible) that he's feeling from the mouth, pussy, or ass his cock is inside of. But once you get a hard-on, no motion is required from you.

Since your brain is your main sex organ by controlling all of the more known sex organs, such a change in masturbation technique is quite an undertaking for the mind. So it will take longer than usual to be taught a new way to orgasm. For every aforementioned change was just that, a lessons in a new way to orgasm.

With that said, it took some time for me to finally orgasm using the Kiiroo Onyx. I purchased a membership to the interactive porn site FeelXVideos.com, and looked at a number of videos. Of the many I watched, they were about 3 that were bringing me closer and closer to an ejaculating orgasm by all of the quick mini-orgasms I had while the Onyx stroked me. I found them on Pornhub, and here they are:

I've always had a thing for male straight pornstar Ben English. Before my becoming sexually active and since, my NON-size-queen self always felt he knew how to work his big dick. And I love a man getting sweaty from sex. So imagine the joy I felt watching him glisten with sweat from pleasuring, not 1, but 2 bodies:

This gay video piqued my interest with its caramel brown Latin boys (one with a nice tanline), 2 both with great asses (the slim guy has a bouncy one), and sand sticking on the naked body getting wet from sex on the beach:

And I have always loved European porn and how they don't hold back on being more equal than American porn in showing the males, and making sure they have hot bodies just like the females.

Like I said, I got these videos off of Pornhub. Now, imagine watching these videos with a sex toy moving on your cock to the same rhythm as the action on the screen. Be that action a handjob, blowjob, or fucking. I learned this by how in the European orgy video, the Onyx started stroking me the second that hot guy's dick went into the woman's mouth.

With all of that said, if the Kiiroo Onyx is of interest to you, click the banners above or the picture of me with my Onyx below.

See Me Return to Mr. Nude York

Well, after my absence last year for reasons stated in a blog post from about a year ago, I'm throwing my name in the hat again to try to be crowned Mr. Nude York.

I still feel win or lose, my presence is necessary. For I'm seeing my greatest fears of Black gay males come to fruition...That they've given up trying to show themselves as a contender for beauty and sex appeal because gay media has beaten down their confidence. Even when these fellow blacks claim to be like me, an exhibitionist. So someone needs to show that we're not all beaten down.

And I will not just be representing my color, but also my age group. For it needs to be shown that just because you're over 30, that doesn't mean you roll over, act dead, and live vicariously through the 20-somethings by paying their way for everything their greed desires. In short, I'm adding messages to this statement I will always make with my exhibitionism: 

By wanting my presence to give such a message, I hope to see you there for support. To be entertained by me, and all the hot bods in their undies.

Come See Me: Sex/Intellect - Same Body, Same Mind

Since 2011, I have been invited to read poetry at The Rainbow Book Fair's COME HEAR! Poetry Salon.

It is an invitation I consider an honor, and for that, I have always graciously accepted. So the invitation to read this year is no different.

For the last few years, I have tried to make my 5-minute appearance within those 6 hours mean something. Something that will linger after I have walked away from the microphone/podium. Last year, I did it better than ever with the poem "Beauty To 44 & 5 Despites". I was constantly stopped by other poets and guests thanking me for addressing the way under-discussed topic of ageism in the gay community. And for that, I thank all who have viewed the viewed the video I did of me reciting the poem shortly after.

With that said, this year, I'm combating how here in America, we as a whole have a problem looking at a person as an intellectual being, as well as a sexual being in the same space and time. Over the years, I've often felt this was why I never saw fans of mine at both my appearances at Will Clark's Porno Bingo and the discussions I've moderated for Men of All Colors Together. This makes us hypocrites in how we present ourselves to the world, for Americaas a whole is nowhere near as evolved as we present ourselves. And I would like to change that. So my plan is to do 2 poems. Two (2) poems that make it unavoidable to see me as both a intellectual and sexual being because there is no break in my 5 allotted minutes.

So what poems can you look forward to for me to accomplish my goal?

Praising Missionary, which is a sexy (sometimes raunchy) foreplay poem about being a bottom, and proud to do so in missionary position.

The necessity for this poem is because "thanks" to porn, both being a bottom and missionary position are seen by many in our community to be ones of weakness, worthy only of disrespect. If you think I'm lying, look at the profiles of bottoms on hook-up sites, and how the bottoms at backrooms and sex parties (too often) allow themselves to be treated. So with this poem, I'm using erotica to instill a much needed mutual respect between bottoms and tops, primarily in the missionary position. With the bottom having the rare chance in any art form to initiate demands for that intimacy.

We Are Armed (H.I.V.E. Soldiers) is my poetic declaration written for those who are HIV+ and their allies.

It's to be their stand against those who are show prejudice towards those with HIV.

I'm scheduled to be on from around 3:15 - 3:20 pm. So if you're in NYC on April 9th, I hope to see you there. And while I'm shy, you don't have to be.

Please, feel free to come up to me and say "Hello".

The Pied Piper of Sex

A few months ago, a friend told me that my posts on my blogs, Facebook, and Twitter make me like "a pied piper of positive sexual energy".

However, one must wonder...how does one accomplish such a feat with a backstory path such as mine?

Going from growing up religious---> a 30 year-old virgin ---> a 30-something porn actor---> an erotic artist whose pride in exhibitionism makes him dog the porn industry?

Few can go through such extremes, and show reasons that are logical.

Well, it's my pleasure to announce that I'll have about 12 minutes to show those reasons for such extremes at an event called Queer Arts Organic. An event in  which I have been invited to be one of the 4 performers on that night, with my presentation titled

"The Pied Piper of Sex".

That night being February 10th, coincidentally is a date that plays a part in my story. So I'll be celebrating an anniversary that night. With that in mind, if you're in NYC, I hope you'll come to Dixon Place that night and celebrate with me. Your presence is the only gift I ask. I hope it's an easy gift to give. For the cost of admission is FREE.

Originally, I planned on writing my autobiography as a book. Recently however, I have been considering writing and performing it as a one-man show. So I am taking this invitation from curator Aimee Herman to be a part of Queer Arts Organic as a way to give my one-man show idea a test run. So goes another reason I hope for you to attend.

With hopes to see you soon,

LeNair Xavier

Leading The Stud To Sex Toys at Kiiroo

I recently wrote an article for the blog of the sex toy company, Kiiroo. The article was about introducing sex toys into the bedroom. They already did it from a female perspective, so I was asked to address it from a male's.

While the photo might make it appear the article is for a straight sex partner, I made sure the article could easily work for a straight or gay sexual partnership. As well as whether the guy is the one toy use is suggested by, or suggested to. I hope you enjoy it.

https://www.kiiroo.com/leading-the-stud-to-sex-toys/

Boss of My Body/The Symphony from Sex

Dear Gay Porn Producers/Directors,

The message in this poem is for you. Especially if I have had the displeasure of working with you, or corresponding with you about working with you...

Normally, after I read a poem and do a striptease in the middle of it, I dash off the stage right after the poem. Not this time. This time, after reading "Boss of My Body", I stuck around to do another poem.

A poem about how often the best music to play during sex is the sound of sex itself....

"The Symphony from Sex".

These videos just go to show that you never know what you're going to get out of me when I take to the stage. ;-)

Skivvies & Naked from April - May

If you're in NYC, there are 2 chances for you to see me LIVE

in my skivvies, or TOTALLY NAKED

this week.

First, here I'll be one of the models. Bringing much needed color to the underwear modeling world. A world that I am still boycotting by going commando most days, as I suggested in a previous post.

Next, as I joked last year, I am the "Susan Lucci" of this contest. For I have entered every year, and never won. Even with that as the case, I am still going for the title of Mr. Nude York.

Just because it's a long shot for a room of mostly White boys to praise the equal beauty of darker skin doesn't mean we men of medium to darker complexion should stay in the crowd merely as patrons voting White. For it tells the racists of that crowd that their narrow-minded view of the color of male beauty is correct when it's not. It also tell them that you don't see yourself as beautiful, so why should they, which is sad. Especially when we're in the multi-colored mecca of New York City.

So I hope to see you out and about with your support. Thank you.

Diversity Rules Talks To Me

In the May 2013 issue of Diversity Rules Magazine, they published my poem, "Seeing Me Before I". Well, this September they are back with their podcast on BlogTalkRadio called Diversity Rules Magazine On The Air. And its host and magazine editor, Jim Koury has invited me to be a guest.

I have no idea what topics we're going to discuss. 

All I know is that I told Jim that NO TOPIC IS OFF LIMITS. However, I have made some suggestions of some under-discussed things in the gay community that I have named on this blog, my Facebook, and Twitter, but I will not name them here.

Also, PLEASE take advantage of the chance to call in to the show, or post questions and comments on the show's Facebook page. I know you have questions about the many positions I've been vocal about. So whether you agree, disagree, or simply want to know more, this will be your chance to have me give some level of a response.

I hope you'll tune in, and I also hope to hear from you. And if by chance you miss it live, don't worry. You will have a chance to hear it afterwards. Until Wednesday.... 

Why I Won't Be A Gay Party Promoter

Gay nightlife is a big part of the gay experience. A part of the gay experience that after my various posts about what's wrong with gay nightlife, such as the massive degree of segregation, it has been suggested that I throw my name in the game as a promoter.

Over the years, I have repeatedly thought about it. And call me arrogant, but I know I have what it takes to make and sell a great party in gay nightlife. I love to see people loving good music and dancing. Also, since sex definitely sells in gay nightlife, if you add to that how many guys have ventured to (or avoided) certain sex parties because of this blog over the years, then I've definitely got that part covered. For the reputation of this blog shows that I can sell sex so good that a monk or nun forced to wear a metal chastity belt will chew it off if their master refuses to give them the key. Just so they can get a little taste of sex. ;-)

However, with all of that, me as a party promoter won't be happening any time soon as far as I can see. For I am realizing that I am overqualified.

The reason I'm overqualified is because I'm not flaky. Flaky, like I've repeatedly observed one or more of the links in the chain to make a gay nightlife party come to fruition. Be it the bar/club owner, party promoter, DJs, bartenders, or go-go boys. One or more of these parties have shown themselves to be so damn flaky that the idea of working in gay nightlife as a promoter gives me a headache before any meeting has even been set up.

I've bordered on experiencing enough headaches seeing a pulchritude of go-go boys flake out on their responsibilities. So if you try to tell me that I'm wrong, then you're only telling a lie to convince yourself. For there's too much proof of my viewpoint by what happens here at NYC gay parties alone. I present to you Exhibits:

A)How many times does a party that is doing some degree well, suddenly stop? Only to be replaced by either no party at all, or a party from a friend of the venue owner;
B)How many times are we promised certain names and faces of go-go boys, only for the roster to change at the last minute? Sometimes it's the promoter's fault. Sometimes it the go-go boy's.
C)How many times are we promised a certain number of go-go boys, only for the actual number to be less than promised? OR it's more than expected, but STILL so damn White that the claim all of these promoters make of their parties being "all-inclusive" is proven to be ONE BIG DAMN LIE!!! Therefore, too white to be representive of not just NYC, but America overall.
With scenarios such as these, it seems the most stable and reliable links in the chain of gay nightlife parties are the DJs, bartenders, and maybe the doorperson.

Now, let's say that all of these people were not flaky as I have seen thus far. My answer remains the same. For I have seen too many nightlife parties where the things that cause fault-lines in our community are practiced on a regular basis. The 3 "-isms" known as "racism", "ageism", and "sexism", and let us not forget prostitution.

Like I said before, selling sex is a big part of gay nightlife. However, selling it on an intellectual level is not entertained much, if at all. Instead, it is often in conjunction with porn-induced stigmas and stereotypes. Hence why porn actors are often used to lure people in. But because of what I know of the usual porn actor mindset from my time in the porn industry, I can't in good conscience subject a porn actor to that. For just because they'll easily agree to be demeaned in their desperation for validation, that doesn't mean I should take advantage of it. Especially, when porn producers, directors, and other party promoters have misled them so far from logic that they are blind to realizing any better. For instance, nowadays when I go to gay nightlife parties and there's a porn actor advertised as an attraction, the porn actor is either too often non-reactionary to being touched, feels so entitled that he doesn't really work, exemplifies every wrong move I addressed in "Go-Go Boy Etiquette...Lacking" (like racism and unjustified preferential treatment of patrons), or a combination of 1 or more of the aforementioned. With that being the case, do I really want to lend my name to this? For one, it would be hypocritical of everything I stand for in addressing sexuality.

For the slogan of this blog is "Still seeing beneath the surface of all we've been told about sex, life & love". And the "LeNair Xavier" brand is about more than just sex, life & love on the surface. It's also (maybe even more so) about sex, life & love below the surface. The mental & emotional motivations to do what we do, as well as the mental & emotional tolls those actions take in the long run. Which means for starters, eradicating stereotypes based on race/ethnicity. Something too many people in nightlife are aware of, but are too interested in the idea of racist White (and not multi-colored) money that they don't put in the effort to make that much needed change come about. Hence why some of my Facebook friends and Twitter followers who are in nightlife are a case of "keeping your friends close, but keep your enemies closer". Meanwhile, others have unfriended me because I spoke a truth about their pimping and/or prostituting ways that was too much truth for them to handle, so their cowardice in facing it made them do a cyber-run by unfriending me.

The problem is that most of gay nightlife is about sex and life on the surface. Without love never factoring in at all. Not even love for oneself, or thy fellow man. Lust definitely, but not love.

If love (especially for thy fellow man) factored in at all, then the blatant racism, and catering to the racist White/light aesthetic would not be the under-discussed plague that it is in the multi-colored, multi-ethnic mecca that is my hometown of New York City, or this country. And it is a waste of good energy to fight it by trying to create a party when it has been shown in this city (among others) that the maturity level of our community as a whole is not ready for the unity in color and ethnicities that I want to offer, or should exist.

It is for this reason, I have decided to instead let my aspirations for a better us make me focus my energy elsewhere. Using my talents to bring the issue to your attention, and let you do with the information what you will. Instead of allowing you to repeatedly miss the much needed message of unity, by serving you alcohol, which can blind you to the truth that you desperately need to see and hear.

 

So I'll try to get my bar/club night filled up when we as a whole do better.

2 Nights Stripping & Naked In New York

For 2 upcoming nights straight I plan on publicly displaying some skin.

First, there's me entering Daniel Nardicio's Mr. Nude York contest for the 3rd time. And probably losing again. But just like I said on the Facebook page telling of the event: I'm entering the contest. Even if I don't win (again), I'm game for any excuse to dance, get naked, and play with hot boners. 

So come cheer me on. For you know I'm going to put on a show regardless. And besides, I don't need a bar to name me "Mr. Nude York". Because my actions the following night will solidify that I'm Mr. Nude York.

I'm speaking of how the next night is the next Titillating Tongues. One in which I plan to go back to how I started appearing there in order to shake things up a bit. Maybe even more necessary since despite my appeal to various gay nightlife publications to tell of this pansexual event, I'm still left as the sole representation of gay male eroticism. So I need to go to extremes to make up for the deficit.

This will be the 1st time since my debut at Titillating Tongues that I will be stripping on the stage of the event. The reason being that it is relevant to the story I'm telling. Plus, no matter how many great stories are being told, the audience needs more of a change to look at than a different person on stage telling a great story through words and poetry to keep their blood pumping. They need visual aid to keep them alive, which is what I'm aiming to be. And since this is an erotic open mic, why not give them an erotic image for their eyes in addition to the image my words will give their mind.

Those words I speak of will be telling of a bondage fantasy of mine where I'm blindfolded and restrained while being gangbanged by 5 hot guys I know, but have never seen naked. Hence the title "Blind Fuck Mind Fuck 5".

So if you want to see this, mark your calendar for April 18th from 7:30 - 9:30 PM. And feel free to bring your cameras and cameraphones. For I have no shame in what I plan to do, and it will be YouTube-safe.

I hope to see you there.

The Gallery at Le Poisson Rouge

158 Bleecker Street

NYC

Doors open at 7 PM. Show from 7:30 - 9:30 PM

Cover $10

Come Hear!...Ghosts of Queers Past

Do you believe in ghosts?

If so, don't be scared. For the ghosts I'll be speaking of in this poem instead of scare us, do more empowering of us when we take a stand.

If you want more details, you'll have to come see me when followed by some erotic haiku, I'll debut this poem as my presentation for The Poetry Salon of The Rainbow Book Fair around 2:40pm EST. The Poetry Salon will be held in Renaissance Room C of the Mezzanine.
Here's a map.

I hope to see you there.

Titillating In A Different Way

Tomorrow night, this Friday, is another month of Titillating Tongues.

This time, I'm doing something a little different. Instead of poetry, I'm telling a story. An erotic tale about how one night at the NYC gay bar, The Cock, I came face-to-face with a celebrity look-alike. The real draw to this story are the fantasies that followed because of this meeting. As well as to why at of all places, The Cock, did these fantasies stay fantasies, and never become reality.

I might do poetry if time allows. But regardless, if you're in NYC, then you'll have to come to the event to find out all of this.

 

 The Gallery at LPR (Le Poisson Rouge)
158 Bleecker Street
New York, NY 10012
(212) 353-3474

By subway, take the A, B, C, D, E, F to West 4th Street-Washington Square.

Doors open for sign-up @ 7pm.

Cover Charge: $10

You can purchase advance tickets via http://eroticaopenmicnyc.eventbrite.com./

21+ Age Limit!

Talking EXPLOITATION et al. with Justin Samuels

My last blog post was about my annoyance with a guy I briefly dated, but remained civil with named, Lovari. For announcing he was producing porn with Latino Fan Club, which features a lot of guys claiming to be "on the down low".  And I've made it no secret about how I feel about that and "gay-for-pay". Hence my annoyance.

Shortly after, Lovari did an interview with blogger/author Justin Samuels who  mentioned my blog post about Lovari in that interview. I then found myself verbally attacked by commenters and responding by re-iterating points I had already made in my blog post about Lovari. Most comments were signed "Anonymous" (chicken shits), and to be honest, I suspect that some were from Lovari himself. For the wording was too similar. Plus, if more than one person's brain is that ass-backwards, then we are truly doomed as a community.

Anyway, to be fair, Justin Samuels offered me an interview to explain my point of view for his audience. I graciously accepted, and not only did we address my viewpoint on producing porn with guys on the down low. We also addressed the state of gay nightlife, gays in the military, and gay marriage as well. So check out the interview:

LeNair Xavier on the Exploitation in the Porn Business and Gay Club Scene 

 

Porno Bingo For The Rainbow Book Fair

January 7, 2011. It was a night to remember.

Most might recall it marking 3 years since my infamous face-to-face verbal confrontation with Diesel Washington. However, it's the event that the confrontation took place at that was the most important to me. For January 7th also marks 3 years since Men of All Colors Together presented me debuting my poetry series with a Q & A telling all many try to ignore about the gay porn industry - simply titled, "The Industry".

Before his untimely death, the host of the sex party, Hot Jock Party helped to promote my event by including mention of it in his emails. I was a regular, and I did attend last party held before my event. I recall telling the clothes check guy about it, him saying how great an idea it was, as well as him saying, "Something good is going to come out of that. You watch."

On the outside, I smiled and said, "Why thank you!". But while hoping for the best, but expecting the worst, my inside voice was saying to him, "You've got to be out of your damn mind! Ain't shit going to come of this!"

Well, fast forward to the morning of January 8, 2011, the day after "The Industry" debuts. I wake up around 10 a.m. checking emails with no expectations in my post wake-up haze. Turns out I did have new email. The 1st email being from someone who attended my poetry reading.

He complimented me on my poetry. He also complimented me no how I handled myself during the Q & A. Both compliments I greatly appreciated, but more so the latter compliment because there were a couple of argumentative dumb-asses there besides Diesel Washington. So being praised on handling them said that I did something right. But in addition to these compliments came him mentioning certain positions that he held, and how he would be willing to assist in my involvement. Such as being involved in with the Leslie-Lohman Museum of Gay & Lesbian Art, as well as The Rainbow Book Fair. Reading this began taking me out of my post wake-up haze. As well as realize that the clothes check guy at that sex party was foreseeing the future. For this is for starters, how I got to meet staffers at the Leslie-Lohman, and how I've been one of the many poets reading in The Rainbow Book Fair's Poetry Salon since March 2011.

So it is this audience member's kindness that got me involved in those and some of the other things you have read about my involvement in over the past 3 years. Such as my modeling for the Leslie-Lohman Drawing Studio, my bartending at Leslie-Lohman openings (which led to a modeling gig), and my drawing "Bi-Butterfly" being in the Leslie-Lohman exhibit, "Queer Art and the Church". 

Now, this gentleman made me aware of the Leslie-Lohman, but he played no part in that drawing being displayed. For when he saw me at the exhibit opening, he though I was just being another art connoisseur. He was actually surprised to see that I actually submitted a piece. However, with such good deeds in mind, it is understandable that I feel that January 8th is a day to remember. So this coming Wednesday, January 8th, with The Rainbow Book Fair as the beneficiary of the night at The Will Clark Show featuring Porno Bingo, then I should be there to show my support.

Some of you might be thinking that with the way I feel about the porn industry now that this might be a hypocritical move. Trust me, it's not. For despite what I think of the porn industry, I'm well aware that without it in my past, I would not be on the upward road I am presently on. So I have no qualms lending my support to a porn-related event when the big picture has it is being for a good cause. And that definitely includes a night like The Will Clark Show featuring Porno Bingo having The Rainbow Book Fair as a beneficiary. For The Rainbow Book Fair is how I've gotten my name to some gay publishers as well as how I became a model for Next Door Magazine that year. You see, I always look at the big picture, and take note of how wide that ripple has spread from that one little drop into a pond.

Most artists' success starts from them being honest and facing bad occurrences  and calling themselves out on bad decisions. Sometimes telling that truth turns into a financial success. Though it is always most importantly, both a mental and emotional success that brings tranquility. And presenting "The Industry" was definitely a mental and emotional success bringing me tranquility. So I'm glad to celebrate its anniversary by attending an event that benefits a good thing that resulted from it. If you're in NYC, I hope you'll stop by and show your support.

Hearing Lust Can Warm You Up

If you live in NYC, or any city across the globe with a public train system where crowded trains are a constant, then the inspiration behind my erotic poem, "J Train Lust" is not foreign to you.

On my way to work 2 Fridays ago, a handsome guy got on the train. To avoid him reading my eyes and seeing how handsome I found him to be, I looked straight down at my own feet. But along with my feet, my peripheral vision caught sight of something else.....This guy's crotch. A slight bulge in the crotch to be more precise. This sent my sexual fantasies into overdrive, and once I transferred to the F train at the Essex Street stop, I pulled out the journal I use to jot ideas down, and started writing. And the result became the poem:

I've also been having some winter sexual fantasies. Like many Blacks, I'm not a big fan of the cold. However, I would endure fucking in the cold (clothed or naked) if the right playmate came along. So considering the body's temperature is 98.6 degrees, that makes sense for my other erotic poem I'm definitely presenting will be entitled:

So if you're in NYC this Friday, come out to Titillating Tongues to hear these stories told.

I normally go for sexually ambiguous with my erotic poetry. But this month, the poems I'm presenting are DEFINITELY GAY.

However, I'm often the only gay male representation of presenters. So gay guys should come out to show we gay males have some solidarity in not only parties promising scantily-clad staff, but in the arts with clothed participants as well. Plus what you hear here comes early enough to be a prelude to the nudity you lust for later. 

Back Titillating With A Vengence

I've become a regular at Mike Geffner's Inspired Word erotica open mic event, Titillating Tongues. Hence why I created a category on this blog dedicated to it.

Usually within a week after my appearance, I'm back at work on something new to present for the next month. However, after my appearance in September, such was not the case. I instead worked on more personal non-sexual material.

I've come to use erotic poetry as a way to address social woes that effect us all. I sometimes tell them from a gay perspective, and other times I've made it sexually ambivalent. The latter is better since as I've said before, Titillating Tongues is an event open to all sexual orientations. Well, this time I'm doing both.

Make Me Pay - We've all had those repeated trysts, hook-ups or booty calls with a friend with benefits, or fuck-buddy (whatever words you want to use) who we know we shouldn't be bothered with because of something they do. Be they a drug/alcohol abuser, a criminal, a gang member, whatever.  However, after allowing ourselves to have sex with them just once, the chemistry between you two makes the sex  so good that you can't say "No" in spite of his flaws. And when the sex is bad, your conscious mind says, you're done. However, your subconscious mind decides that the next time will be better...And it turns out being right. But what isn't right is the fact that you gave in the first time. So you subconsciously use some kind of BDSM in sex to punish yourself for that giving in. Well, that's the story behind "Make Me Pay".

Normally in my poetry, I give a solution. But this time, do I stick to that program, or am I changing it up to tell a tale of hot sex that you can relate to, but have to figure out an individual solution for your individual situation? You'll just have to come by to see and hear for yourself.

Wet Your Flesh - There's really no big explanation of the backstory here. This poem is simply about initiating oral sex as foreplay, but also giving your partner the option to make it all he/she wants to do. Also, most talk of oral sex focuses on working the front, while rimming is something addressed in passing. Not in this poem. There is just as much talk about oral play to the backside as there is to the front.

The reason for the title of this post is because I feel the honesty of those personal poems I did during my month away from Titillating Tongues has trickled into these 2 poems. So I'm going to be more honest & direct than I've ever been, or ever thought possible. And for erotica, that means possibly more raunchy. This has me quite excited to see the audience reaction.

So if you're in NYC, come see for yourself on November 15th.

@

The Gallery at Le Poisson Rouge

158 Bleecker Street

NYC

Cover: $10

Sign up starts @ 7 PM

Show goes from 7:30 - 9:30 PM

My Staff Picks For The Pleasure Chest

For November, The Pleasure Chest is promoting Staff Picks. We are by no means required to tell why they're our picks. I just felt that since I have this blog, I could give you a more detailed reasoning for mine.

VixSkin Mustang Dildo - I have said in past blog posts that I am not a big fan of toys. That's why whenever you've seen me use a toy in a XTube video, it was the only time I've ever used it. It was the thrill of entertaining my porn-viewing audience that got me through the video, not me being thrill by the toy necessarily. However, since working at The Pleasure Chest, I've been coming across a variety that's starting to change my mind.

Let me start by admitting that I have never played with a VixSkin Mustang dildo. This is on my Staff Pick list as more of a wishlist item. It became that way because one day walking along the sales floor, I decided to touch one to see why they cost $119.95. I was so shocked by the initial real-feel silicone (called VixSkin™ silicone) that I literally jumped. That made me decide that if I was going to play with a dildo, then I want a VixSkin. With their wide variety, I chose the Mustang because it's long enough go deep if that's your pleasure, and it's not too thin or too wide. Now, with that price also comes a realistic choice of colors, plus that real feel I mentioned earlier including detailed texture like veins from an erection, and a soft top with a firmer middle like a real cock makes it worth it. So the age-old expression, "You get what you paid for" does come to mind. As well as VixSkin's own slogan, "worth every inch".

So in short, my reason for this staff pick is because if I'm going to play with a fake dick, then I need it to feel like one. In a variety of ways that can (for a time) fool my body's sense of touch. But remember should you buy this or any silicone toy, use water-based lube. For odd as it may seem, silicone lube breaks down silicone toys.

Durex Extra Sensitive Condoms - I've used quite a variety of condoms over time. Some are introduced to me by me purchasing them out of my own curiosity, while others are by the rare appearance of a name-brand at a sex party. Well, Durex Extra Sensitive Condoms were introduced to me by the latter. I was topping a guy at a sex party, and a Durex condom was what I had pulled out of my sock.

First off, it didn't have a thick packaging, which was great. For you need to conserve your energy for fucking, not overexert yourself opening a condom wrapper. Second, I have the same love/hate relationship with condoms as any other guy. So while loathing the thought of lessened sensation, I was pleasantly surprised to like the feeling once I started fucking the guy. And since I'm that geeky and proper (even at a sex party), I was holding the condom wrapper in my hand, instead of throwing it on the floor like most guys do. So once I was done, I look at exactly what kind of Durex condom I had just topped the guy with. And that's how I discovered it was Extra Sensitive.

Unfortunately, Durex Extra Sensitive is not sold on the website. So you would have to stop by your nearest Pleasure Chest store to pick them up.

Any TENGA toys - I have slowly but surely been becoming a fan of Tenga toys. I first came across a Soft Tube cup through The Pleasure Chest. And in a recent training session, I was given the masturbation sleeve, Tenga Egg with the Surfer interior. Both of these gave me orgasms with convulsions.

With that being the case, I put any Tenga toy on my Staff Pick list because in addition to those 2 based on experience, I'm now adding to my wishlist a Tenga Flip Hole. Or would that be 4 Tenga Flip Holes?

Because you see, the Tenga Flip Hole comes in 4 colors.

White, Black, Red, and Silver, and each color....

....has a different interior.

And variety is the spice of life.

SPUNK lube - No matter how much we preach about safe sex, it's time to be honest....We all wish we lived in a condom-free world. So for many of us, cum could forever be our lube. Well, if you're the Condom Police, SPUNK lube can help along that fantasy of such a sexual utopia. And if you're a member of the BBBH (BareBack BrotherHood), it's a nice, useful toy to add to your reality. And if you're somewhere in between, it will please you, too.

For it really does look like they found a way to take jizz, preserve it to stay opaque (since cum turns clear after being outside the body for awhile), and pack it into bottles and packets. What makes it even better is the fact that it actually works.

Most likely because it's a hybrid (silicone/water) lube, SPUNK does last you. I wish bars and sex parties carried SPUNK instead of that crappy free lube that dries and absorbs into your skin almost instantly. But again comes that age old saying, "You get what you paid for."

So I hope you like my Staff Picks. So much so that if you live outside of a city where a Pleasure Chest is located, that you'll go to the website and order one or more of my picks. However, if you live in NYC, it would be best to stop by one of the 2 stores. Now should you buy one or more of these items, let them know it was my advice that piqued your interest. And if you come to the Upper East Side location at 1150 2nd Avenue (between East 60th & East 61st Streets), feel free to ask for me by name. I'm not there all the time, but if I am, I'll be glad to assist you. And if not me, there's always other equally or more qualified staff able to assist you. Take care.