Friday, April 29, 2016

Sex Toy Review - Sensuelle Pro Homme

The sex toy industry can be very gender specific. Even at times when it doesn't need to be. Such as in the case of the Sensuelle Pro Homme.

For if you've noticed that the Sensuelle Pro Homme looks very much like the Sensuelle G, the female G-spot vibrator, there's a reason for it.

It's because the Sensuelle Pro Homme and the Sensuelle G are the same exact toy. Just different colors for gender-specific marketing purposes. So if you're a male wanting a purple toy instead of a black one, there's nothing wrong with going over to the section for female vibrators and picking up a Sensuelle G. And vice versa for you female readers.

With that said, female readers can take all that I say about the Sensuelle Pro Homme pleasing the prostate and very easily apply it to why that toy and the Sensuelle G might please a woman's G-spot. Also, if a straight couple considers a night of playing with toys (instead of intercourse), with one toy for her vagina and one for his anus, using these 2 toys on each other might be just what you're looking for.

None of this is to start this review by saying that the Sensuelle Pro Homme is a bad toy. It's just to establish before proceeding how I'm aware that for some readers, there might be a level of familiarity when seeing this toy. So if such is the case, those readers are made aware they're not wrong.

So to proceed, the features of the Sensuelle Pro Homme include:
* Made of silicone. Therefore, it's non-porous and won't hold bacteria after cleaning
* Water-resistant
* Rechargeable
* 10 vibration patterns
* Massage ball in the tip has 3 speeds

The reason I've included these gifs of the massage ball in the toy's tip is because if a demo of this toy is not out, then you don't know exactly how this feature looks.

So speaking of the massage ball, the back and forth motion of the prostate massaging ball is one way of giving the user the option of using their hands to move the Sensuelle Pro Homme for stimulation or not. For combined with one of the 10 vibration patterns, the massage ball's back and forth motion makes it very easy to imagine being stimulated by your fantasy person's back and forth motion. A feature that is unlike most vibrators and even more so, vibrating prostate massagers.

NOTE: To intensify the massage ball's rubbing on the prostate, if laying down on a bed, I suggest simply pushing the Sensuelle Pro Homme more towards the bed. As well as an up-and-down push of the massager makes an even more intense experience.

From all of this, it should be no surprise that my orgasm from this toy was intense. In addition, I noticed something that I'm sure stems from the prostate massaging ball. I ejaculated more semen from use of this toy than from not just a typical handjob, but also more than any other vibrating toy I've used anally. And I'm sure it's because of the actual massage AND vibration on the prostate, as opposed to the only vibration on the prostate from other toys.

With all that said, I would rate the Sensuelle Pro Homme as one of the best electronic sex toys used anally that I have encountered to date.

Sunday, April 24, 2016

Comment To Broadly's "Why Gay Porn Stars Keep Dying"

I recently came across an article on the website Broadly titled "Why Gay Porn Stars Keep Dying". With my porn past, and all I have said in the past about the industry and its most loyal fans, you know I have a viewpoint on this. So due to how much I had to say, and even more so, since there is no comments section at Broadly, I found the author's email address and write him an email to give my comment.

So the following is an open letter of that email:

Hello Steven.

As a former gay porn actor, knowing that I've been eyewitness to all that leads to these porn actor deaths made me unable to sit through all of what you wrote.

For the reason so many porn actors die young is because the industry preys upon their desperation for validation. I knew because I like "Alex" came from a religious upbringing. And after my first day on a porn set, I felt sexually liberated. Like my having gay sex for all the world to see validated my degree of homosexuality. But when confronted with the racism, I saw the truth of the industry and how much bad we were contributing to the gay community. For whether studios admit it or not (and practically all won't), gay porn is a teacher to a newly out gay, and has taught many of the older gays now of how to interact with each other. It is for this reason that the community is also to blame for these porn actor deaths.

For the gay community needs to stop letting gay porn be its teacher of how to interact with other gay males. Just because we're gay doesn't mean that we have to be rebellious like teenagers, and spit on what our straight parents taught us about courtship and commitment. But the gay community led by gay porn's illusion of how we are to interact with each other does it all the time. 

And why are gay porn actors treated like the community's heroes? For seeing them at bar events as go-go boys, these white and Latino go-go boys are the most obnoxious with a sense of entitlement that is sickening. They have no work ethic whatsoever. Why? Because the racism of the industry makes them feel like the world is theirs. But give it a few months to a year, and reality kicks in. And they need drugs & alcohol to numb themselves to the reality.

Maybe my being a man of color who wasn't the white-ordained picture of black male beauty kept me grounded in knowing that my opportunities in the business were slim, which made me keep my work ethic in check. So in that case, being black and not a sell-out were a blessing as to why I'm alive today.

Now, while I didn't read to entire article, one of the things that made me stop was my absolute disgust at Conner Habib, and you giving him a platform to speak ignorance such as this from your article:
 When I spoke to Habib, he stressed to me how empowering porn can be. "You learn how to have sex with people you're not attracted to and you learn to perform all sorts of acts that would normally be exhausting. It's a really intense skill set, and the people who succeed are the people who do it well, who can perform."

Let me tell you firsthand, porn STARTS OUT making you feel empowered, but soon after, if you ever stop to get your sense of self back, you'll see it's all an ILLUSION. For what stable-minded human being wants to learn how to have sex with people they are not attracted to? If you say prostitutes, let me clearly state that for that reason, prostitutes are NOT stable-minded people. I've had prostituting moments in my porn career, and I knew that if I kept doing scenes under those conditions, I'd become like most gay males are thanks to emotional cripple. For sex be it with a life partner or one-night stand should be about a spiritual connection.

With that said, for Conner Habib to make such a statement, his "activism" is obviously to further make gay males self-loathing emotional cripples who do stupid shit because of that self-loathing. Therefore, if Conner Habib has any kind of degree in regards to mental health, then it needs to be revoked immediately

Now, you have my permission to post this. I have no reason to hide the truth that I speak. Thank you.

Keep Being U2B. FREE,
LeNair Xavier originally gained notoriety in the underground as adult entertainer, "Tré Xavier". Now, since parting ways with the porn industry, he is making a brand of LeNair Xavier - as a writer, blogger, artist, performer, and model. Still demanding equality, and not just racial equality. But in all areas he believes in, and is asked to lend his voice.

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

It's Not A Bussy, Mussy, Man-gina, or Boy-pussy! It's an Asshole, You Ass-head!

Recently, I went a Milk Chocolate NYC party held at Paddles. I was approached by this Latino with a hot ass. He asked me to fuck him, and with that ass, I just couldn't resist.

He put a condom then lube on my dick, and took me over to what look like a doctor's examination table. He then assumed the position to be fucked from behind. Ignoring the taste of that horrible Lifestyles lube given out for free, I ate his ass for a bit. As an ass-man, it was a must. I then put my cock in his ass, and he moaned instantly. And with each of my thrust he got louder and louder. At one point, I pulled back so far to go in with a harder thrust that I slipped out. He took that as a chance to get on his back. I then proceeded to top him. Between the sounds of body slaps from my sweaty groin meeting his lubed ass, and the metal of that exam table shaking from my thrusts, we definitely caught guys' attention. So a crowd quickly formed.

While I was topping him to ecstasy, I heard someone commentating. Now, while I hate guys commentating, I accept that what I'm doing is turning them on. And as an exhibitionist, I have no problem with that. However, the problem I have with commentators is that they often say stuff that makes them either sound stupid, OR prove they are stupid.

And sadly I must report, the latter is what happened with this commentator. For while I was banging the fuck out of the Latino, making him moan and grab me as he begged for more, this big roided-up-looking black guy said, "Yeah. Pound that pussy!"

The words made the Symphony of Sex we were creating screech to a halt in my head. Like the sound of an LP being stopped on a turntable back in the day. So I tried to ignore him, but he said it a few more times. With each time making my tolerance drop like a pressure gauge when you let go of the pump. So giving less than a fuck about his size, I was a step away from telling him to shut the fuck up...

Because I hate, hate, HATE hearing a gay male call a man's asshole a "pussy", or any word that equates it with being a female's vagina. So that includes "cunt", "bussy", "mussy", "man-gina", or "boy-pussy".

Back in the day when I was blogging for Pitbull Productions, I wrote a blog post about the rare occasion I would accept a guy calling my asshole a "pussy", "cunt", or any word that is close to equating it with a vagina. I said it would be when I'm having sex with a guy who is making his way from living a lie of calling himself "straight" to finally coming out as gay or bisexual. Once he's out however, he's to call my asshole exactly what it is, an asshole.

My position still stands on that. For I own my gayness. However, I understand not everyone can come out like I did grabbing their degree of homosexuality by the horns. Unlike me, who never dated a male or female before my coming out to myself, many guys dated females before coming out. Therefore, their coming out is even more of a process. He's going from putting his penis in one body orifice known specifically for a female to putting it in a body orifice that both genders possess, but during that time, he can easily see and/or be touched by the same genitalia as him. So I'm understanding in letting them use words to weed them off of sex with females for that coming out process.

With that said, if you need to use of such words for your process, then you're at a point in your coming out process that you need to have sex in the presence of those who know of your process. Saying such words to a stranger at a gay male sex party makes you look like you don't belong. And if you're at that point of your process, then not to be mean, but in all honesty, you don't belong...yet.

In other cases, a guy claiming to be totally gay using words like "bussy", mussy" or "man-gina" is like a gay guy once tried to say about my defining myself as a predominately gay bisexual...He said he viewed bisexuals as gays trying to hold on to the straight world. Well, who's trying to hold on to the straight world more? Me, who stands firm on the position of calling my asshole an "asshole"? OR the kind of gays claiming to be totally gay, yet referring to a male's assholes as "bussy", "mussy", "man-gina", or "boy pussy"?...

Such gay males seem to have "pussy envy", and want to compete with females. But NEWS FLASH, GUYS! If you base your competition on quantity, YOU CAN'T!!!

We males have 2 holes that can please a man's dick - our mouth and our asshole. Meanwhile, females have 3 holes - their mouth, their pussy, and their ass. So we males need to be men, and suck up the lost. Females have us beat when it comes to quantity.

However, (if you must compete) we can present a competition with quality. After all, a female having 3 holes to please a dick doesn't mean she's maintaining them well. For I'm sure my tight well-kegeled asshole can give a woman's well-kegeled pussy a run for its money. So stop being size-queens and popper-addicted cock-cowards creating loosey-goosey holes for yourself, and maintain what you have.

When I'm having gay sex with a totally out gay man, he's to share in the mindset of owning his orientation. Any signs that he's not by using those aforementioned words makes him lose his sex appeal to me. For words are a big turn on. And not just for me because I'm a writer, but for many. There are many more word-pervs out there than you know. If you agree with my position on this, you're probably one yourself.

So keep us happy by calling a dick, "dick", a pussy, "pussy", and an ass, "ass".

Sunday, April 17, 2016

Open Letter To Chris Ryan on Racism

Chris Ryan is a NYC party promoter. He recently posted a question on Facebook regarding sexual racism, which resulted in too many reactions from some whites that were not unexpected, but are therefore saddening since they don't speak well of us as a community. And as a NYC party promoter, Chris may unknowingly on some level enable these reactions to live on. So after seeing this reaction too many times before on other party promoter's pages, I decided to possibly enlighten him as to why such reactions exist, and why they are wrong. And it's my seeing it many times before on promoter's pages that I'm posting it as an open letter...

Hello Chris,

I recently saw this Facebook post of yours:

I will give you an answer, as well as get to how I feel about your question later on in this message. But let me start by saying that it's sad to say that I was disgusted, but not at all surprised by some of the comments I saw in response to your question. For too many of your 1st white commenters were quick to either brush the question off with a "Here we go again?" or a quick non-explanatory "No".

Such comments are common for mainly a white person, but also a person of a light complexioned ethnicity coming from an upbringing (in their youth and/or time in the gay community), or a medium to dark complexioned person trying to avoid a charge of being perceived as "angry" by any of the aforementioned. For the best known gay media sources including The Advocate, Out, Instinct, Queerty, etc., as well as gay porn and gay nightlife furthers along the "mind"-set that in knowledge, beauty, and sex appeal "white, then light are the only rights". So we are all taught that if we fuck and love white/light, we should never question ourselves when we do so. Hence the sense of white entitlement displayed among your commenters who refuse to stop and question themselves. This furthers along the reality of the stigma of how gay males have arrested development issues.

We are so bombarded by these images of what is smart and sexy by a short spectrum of color, while the color spectrum of human skin is actually way more vast. So since we as humans are not immune to coercion. we must stop and ask ourselves if our attraction is ours naturally, or media-influenced. Again, the whites with a sense of White Entitlement and arrogance endorsed by white-dominated gay outlets will be quick in refusing to do that look within. For they are the ones benefiting from it, and too stingy to share such glory.

What is most troubling about this is how meanwhile, all of the aforementioned who refuse to ask themselves if their attraction to whites/light is natural or media-influenced are quick to make someone question themselves if that someone should want a lover of a medium to dark complexion. Case in point, there are many times when I've been out, and a white/light person has given me a look of interest, but won't do a thing or say a single word. However, later in the night, I'll see them give that same look to a white/light person, and spring into action without hesitation.

Now, I have made no secret of battling my own racism towards other black males. And I have also made it no secret how that racism was induced by the trauma of my growing up where I was surrounded by black males who fit every negative stereotype seen in media. After realizing that since I'm a decent black man, therefore there must be more, I'm still in the process of finding more and more other black males as sexually attractive. But the only reason that has occurred is because I practice what I am preaching. I stopped to take a look at myself to ask myself:
And once I discovered what taught it to me, ask myself...

Such a look within is the act of a man. An adult. The problem is those who write such comments as "Here we go again?" or a the non-explanatory "No" are not man enough to do that look within.

So with all of this, the answer to your question is YES, it is racist. For we all have a preference, but only the shallow among us are the ones who refuse to believe the truth of how both sex and love are spiritual connections. And if you have enough depth to let that spiritual connection take over, you can find yourself sexually and/or romantically attracted to someone who is not of your usual preference. For the very 1st time I ever had sex with a Black man was for my 1st porn movie. Before that movie, my preference for guys lighter than myself took precedence. But since that movie and my look within, I have had a few occasions of sex with Black men outside of porn and sex party environments, and briefly courted one as well. Why? Because I saw something in their spirit that drew me in, and I wanted that spiritual connection with them in sex and/or love for it. So the only thing to stop someone from putting themselves in a place/situation to possibly feel and act on feeling that connection is RACISM.

Note: The fact that I've dated/sexed more lighter complexioned people than blacks does not mean lighter people are better. Every color is equally fucked up. Hence why I'm single.

Now, let me close with what I promised from the beginning in telling you how I feel about your question....Since a social media site like Facebook is where many go to validate their viewpoint by gathering "Likes", I can't help but wonder if your question on Facebook was simply a way to feel validated by all those who gave you that non-explanatory "no", Add to you being a party promoter, therefore on some level enables the racist mindset, which might give financial (but not spiritual) success, I'm even more skeptical. But I hoping more so that this question was posted because it is a genuine concern of yours. If such is the case, then I commend you for asking the question. For it shows somewhere in you, you are aware that so much of what I've said here is TRUE. So you have compassion. Now, whether or not you let that realization and compassion come to the forefront of your heart and mind enough to take further action in any way within your reach, that is up to you.

I hope this message came through with respect and diplomacy. If I diverted from that at any point, based on all I've witnessed, I hope you understand my frustration. Thank you.


Thursday, April 14, 2016

See Me Return to Mr. Nude York

Well, after my absence last year for reasons stated in a blog post from about a year ago, I'm throwing my name in the hat again to try to be crowned Mr. Nude York.

I still feel win or lose, my presence is necessary. For I'm seeing my greatest fears of Black gay males come to fruition...That they've given up trying to show themselves as a contender for beauty and sex appeal because gay media has beaten down their confidence. Even when these fellow blacks claim to be like me, an exhibitionist. So someone needs to show that we're not all beaten down.

And I will not just be representing my color, but also my age group. For it needs to be shown that just because you're over 30, that doesn't mean you roll over, act dead, and live vicariously through the 20-somethings by paying their way for everything their greed desires. In short, I'm adding messages to this statement I will always make with my exhibitionism: 

By wanting my presence to give such a message, I hope to see you there for support. To be entertained by me, and all the hot bods in their undies.

Friday, April 1, 2016

Come See Me: Sex/Intellect - Same Body, Same Mind

Since 2011, I have been invited to read poetry at The Rainbow Book Fair's COME HEAR! Poetry Salon.

It is an invitation I consider an honor, and for that, I have always graciously accepted. So the invitation to read this year is no different.

For the last few years, I have tried to make my 5-minute appearance within those 6 hours mean something. Something that will linger after I have walked away from the microphone/podium. Last year, I did it better than ever with the poem "Beauty To 44 & 5 Despites". I was constantly stopped by other poets and guests thanking me for addressing the way under-discussed topic of ageism in the gay community. And for that, I thank all who have viewed the viewed the video I did of me reciting the poem shortly after.

With that said, this year, I'm combating how here in America, we as a whole have a problem looking at a person as an intellectual being, as well as a sexual being in the same space and time. Over the years, I've often felt this was why I never saw fans of mine at both my appearances at Will Clark's Porno Bingo and the discussions I've moderated for Men of All Colors Together. This makes us hypocrites in how we present ourselves to the world, for Americaas a whole is nowhere near as evolved as we present ourselves. And I would like to change that. So my plan is to do 2 poems. Two (2) poems that make it unavoidable to see me as both a intellectual and sexual being because there is no break in my 5 allotted minutes.

So what poems can you look forward to for me to accomplish my goal?

Praising Missionary, which is a sexy (sometimes raunchy) foreplay poem about being a bottom, and proud to do so in missionary position.
The necessity for this poem is because "thanks" to porn, both being a bottom and missionary position are seen by many in our community to be ones of weakness, worthy only of disrespect. If you think I'm lying, look at the profiles of bottoms on hook-up sites, and how the bottoms at backrooms and sex parties (too often) allow themselves to be treated. So with this poem, I'm using erotica to instill a much needed mutual respect between bottoms and tops, primarily in the missionary position. With the bottom having the rare chance in any art form to initiate demands for that intimacy.

We Are Armed (H.I.V.E. Soldiers) is my poetic declaration written for those who are HIV+ and their allies.

It's to be their stand against those who are show prejudice towards those with HIV.

I'm scheduled to be on from around 3:15 - 3:20 pm. So if you're in NYC on April 9th, I hope to see you there. And while I'm shy, you don't have to be.

Please, feel free to come up to me and say "Hello".

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