Sunday, September 29, 2013

Black Guys, I Don't Owe You A Feel, OR A Fuck!

Whether it is at a sex party or even the backroom area of the NYC gay bar, The Cock, I have had one too many instances where Blacks guys seem to not take "No" for an answer. Though also unjust and intolerable, I'm aware that old White guys not accepting a "No" is because they've dedicated so much of their lives to their career that they lost the looks they had when they looked like the pretentious Whites we see today, sacrificing any real sexual social life in the process. So they have now become desperate. But what is the excuse of these young Black guys who are initially good looking, but become ugly by acting this way?

Before I continue, I'm sure some of you are ready to blame me for experiencing this by you asking, "Why go in the bar backroom, or a sex party if I know this might happen?"

It's a simple answer. It's because studying someone in the midst of the primal urge of sex, you get to learn who these people really are. For sex is so primal, many forget their filter, and you learn what they are capable of doing and saying, as well as the fucked-up mindsets they are governed by. Proof of this being that many single guys I found who knowingly avoid backrooms or sex parties, or always stand on the outskirts of the action playing the Cackling Hen commentator are the ones who have either experienced all that I am reporting in this post thus far and beyond, so they are no longer interested. OR they are the ones hiding the most, possibly even more heinous extremes of these behaviors.

Now, it's easy to let guys' compliments to me have me say that the reason for this behavior is that I'm "so attractive" that it casts a spell of some kind on them that they can't help themselves. Well, that excuse 1)makes it my fault, so you're blaming the "victim"; 2)rids them of taking responsibility for their actions; and 3)does not allow me to be humble about my looks, as I want and should be. Because at some point, as time moves on, so will this youthful appearance. And I refuse to act as if I don't know that.

So the one reason that makes sense to explain this behavior is that these Black guys make niggers of themselves by following some cultural credo that says to act this way. That because I'm Black, I owe them a chance to cop a feel. Or I owe them a fuck. Making whether I say "No" or not become irrelevant. And before anyone goes there, I am more than aware that there are also Whites, Latinos, Asians, Middle Easterners, etc. gay and straight who make niggers of themselves for following these racial entitlements and "'No' means 'yes'" credos. But here, I am speaking of my experience as a Black man that you can probably relate to depending on your own ethnicity or color.

Another reason is one that many don't want to admit to. Porn. For no matter how much you want to deny it, porn is still a gay male's teacher in how we sexually interact. With that said, it becomes obvious that the likes of the token Blacks from the big name White studios and most Black performers you see in ethnic porn are teaching gay Black guys weak-minded enough to follow that the overcompensating aggressive top behavior is the way to go. Which leaves other Blacks, Whites, or whatever ethnicity of the perceived bottom to comply without a fight, and tolerate the overcompensating rough sex from this top. It is for this reason that as much interracial sex as I have, I am unable to relate and find beauty in seeing it in porn, even if I top. For I have no intentions of lowering myself to being another nigger gorilla like Bobby Blake, Diesel Washington, one of the sell-outs in Chi Chi LaRue's "Blackballed" series, a FlavaWorks video, etc.

I expect better of myself, and so should my sex partner. That is IF he was wise enough to choose me to be me, and not the Black things he sees in videos. The problem is too many are looking for the latter.

YES, there is an overload of racist Whites in this country, as well as racist non-Blacks whose culture from whatever country they (or their parents) are from taught them to "marry White, because Black is whack".
YES, there is an overload of these same guys who are racist because of the influence of the racist Whites running gay entertainment (porn, nightlife, and media), but don't even realize they're racist sacks of shit.
YES, wrong as it is, porn teaches non-Blacks to be punished for their guilt of past and present sins of Whites and gay entertainment by having a Black guy fuck you so hard that you damn near puke out your innards.
And therefore YES, all forms of gay entertainment tell this weak-minded racist majority that if you feel you must have sex with Blacks that they're good enough for just a fuck, but not good enough for love.

But NONE OF THIS justifies you thinking I don't have a right to turn you down just because I'm Black. Because first of all, when you exhibit this kind of behavior,...

I am not Black like you. For you have made yourself NOT my "brother" or "brutha".

I am a human being FIRST. Therefore right or wrong, I am entitled to my choices. And you don't dismiss my right to choose by putting your hands on me after I have politely moved it. Thereby making it the right choice to dismiss you, and even do you bodily harm for invading the personal space that is my body. Regardless of where we might be, even if that's at a sex party, or backroom.

My dismissing you will never be because I "hate being Black" as one guy tried to tell me once. Otherwise, in a recent tweet after a sex party when I said that I felt like I topped the gay U.N., one of those many colors of bottoms was Black. And he got my attention by not following a porn credo. First, by being a bottom, then by loving my passionate, but non-abusive sex. But despite me overcoming my past racism against other Black males, the more Black guys keep up that negative behavior, and the more (unlike the guy from the sex party) the number increases of them imitating these nigger gorillas in porn, the more you will push me back to that dark place of being racist against other Black males. For it makes me border on asking myself, why should I stay in the light when you won't behave in a manner that shows I was right to bring myself there?

I've come a long way from what I used to be with that racism. So it would be wise to not make me go back there. Because as with any relapse, the next going to be worst.

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Lights! Camera! Now FUCK!/How Lust Should Be

This past Friday, I presented 2 pieces for my presentation for the erotica open mic event, Titillating Tongues. One was my anti-porn/pro-exhibitionism poem that I mentioned before, "Lights! Camera! Now FUCK!", and the other was a short sexy song countering what we see in porn by stating what should be in porn. Hence why the song was entitled, "How Lust Should Be".

With the audio from that night, I made 2 slideshow videos using sexy photos to help tell the story of the pieces. Including photos by PhotoFreedom, myself, and the overly photoshopped work of one my former porn directors, Tyson Cane.

Now, if watching videos isn't your thing then simply read the lyrics to both pieces, and don't focus on the pictures. Either way, ENJOY.

Before I go any further, let me say that Titillating Tongues is a great event. Hence why I've been attending it just about every month for a little more than a year now. However, if you live in or are visiting NYC at the time of one, the event could seriously use some gay male representation besides myself as both performers and audience members. For since it is an event meant to be welcoming to all orientations, there is no excuse to cut our gay selves off. Especially when one of the things the fight for gay rights claims is to want entertainment that is more inclusive and accepting of homosexuality. Well, look no further. You have it here. So staying away makes our community seem untrustworthy by being overflowing with hypocrites. So let's show we're better than that, shall we?

With that said, if I'm able to attend the next one, I do hope to see you there.

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Vote LogoTV For Hypocrisy

I recently responded to a former Facebook friend, Glenn Payne's posting of a request for dancers for a tv spot for the tv channel, Logo. I was to receive a phone call the next day to get more details. However, this never came to be. For about 18 hours later, I received something, but it was not a phone call. It was a Facebook message from Glenn. Telling me that their "standards & practices" say that they can't have anyone who has posed nude or done porn representing their "brand".


This rule of "standards" coming from a channel that airs "1 Girl 5 Gays" where they sit and talk graphically about sex. The channel that also airs "That Sex Show", which features a porn actress on its panel of "experts". The channel that has MTV as one of their sister channels, home of various shit-shows, like "Jersey Shore", but most notably at the moment, the Video Music Awards (VMAs).

In the past, I have given some harsh criticisms to Logo, primarily in regards to their being an American channel with a serious lack of ethnic diversity in their lineup. With that and me owning my criticisms and the consequences of saying it publicly being the case, I could have stomached their reasoning for not wanting me being because of those numerous criticisms. For in owning all that I have said and knowing human nature, people will retaliate in some fashion when you criticize them no matter how right you are. But if this was such a retaliation, I could respect them more for doing so with honesty. Instead of the pretentious, hypocritical bullshit rhetoric I was fed. For they didn't make me need to take back what I have said about them in the past. Instead, not allowing me to be a part of this tv spot not only reaffirms my past negative criticisms, but actually embeds them deeper in stone.

My offer of my talent for that tv spot was to extend an olive branch to Logo TV, and give them a chance to in some way undo my past criticisms of them. But instead, this response was them breaking the olive branch in 2 before I made it through the door.

Some might think that my viewpoint of my prowess as a performer is quite arrogant. Well, that is a viewpoint for those with low self-esteem, and a bad sense of self-worth. For performers need to realize how powerful a component they are in the equation of the finished product of any production....

For without performers, directors have no one to direct. Therefore, producers have nothing to produce.

I'm sure that those eager to see misery and woe in others to be company to their own misery are reading this thinking, "Oh, they hurt poor LeNair's feelings. YAY!...I mean, how sad."

Bitch, please! I am on a road upward. And trust me, not Logo TV, its brother/sister channels, and parent company combined are important enough to make or break the good path I am on. This spot with Logo was to just kill time along the way. So this venting is not because Logo gave me a road block. It's simply to expose the principle (or lack thereof) on Logo's part.

It is also to teach those who are so eager to get into porn that there are hypocritical ass-heads like those at LogoTV, who will incite you to go for porn stardom, then try kicking dirt in your face the first chance their guilt over loving porn and other displays of sexuality kicks in. And it is those in the sex trade who can't rise above those pretentious hypocrites that end up trapped in that world, then drinking, drugging, or directly committing suicide as a means to escape the pain of rejection. So I am exposing Logo's "standards" so that these wannabes are aware that this is what you face if you don't have an out when the light of your porn stardom fades.

For trust me, it most certainly will fade. So you better prepare for the hypocrisy that follows when it does.

Friday, September 13, 2013

Behind 'Lights! Camera! Now FUCK!'

There are 4 words that I’m sure any exhibitionist should love to hear when getting in front of a camera. Those 4 words are…
Well, my plans for the next Titillating Tongues is to explore how one should connect these 4 words to being part of the porn industry. For while I've never heard those words yelled at me on a porn set, there are certain sentiments behind those 4 words that are very much present on any porn company's set. Sentiments that very often differ from those when they are said away from a porn company's set.

I also plan on closing with a brief song entitled "What Lust Should Be" to go out with a happy ending.

So if you're in NYC, I hope to see you there. For even though I'm only on the stage delivering a good erotic message for about 5 minutes, there's plenty more talent to bear witness to at this open mic event.

The Gallery at Le Poisson Rouge
158 Bleecker Street
$10 cover
Doors open at 7 PM
Performances from 7:30 - 9:30 PM

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Why Gay Males Have Anal Sex

The title might seem like it has a simple answer. However, this is me we are talking about here. So you know that I can see that there are a few more factors as to why gay men have anal sex beyond answering such a question with the obvious question....

What Other Hole Is There?
This is the perceived simple question-answering-a-question that I am speaking of. As gay males, besides the mouth, we have no other orifice for a male to put his dick. But there may be more to it than just that, which I'll explain later.

Sex As A Weapon
Let’s get this sad, but very real fact out of the way.

Since the dawn of mankind, anal sex has also been used as a weapon by heterosexual males to belittle, humiliate, shame, and avenge. Unfortunately, whether based on cultural or personal history, this practice of anal sex as a weapon has followed some gay males into their sex lives today.

We see it all too often in porn scenarios where Black tops have this aggression towards White bottoms that can easily be surmised as them using sex to avenge their enslaved forefathers, as seen in Chi Chi LaRue’s “Blackballed” series. Or websites like ThugHunter where in the 21st century a White guy uses anal sex to humiliate Blacks like they did during slavery. Or sites like FraternityX,, HazeHim, ItsGonnaHurt (and the list goes on) where anal sex is used as a weapon against their partners or themselves.

What makes this so sad is that such scenarios are imitated by the many of us who initially used gay porn as their gay sex guide book. So it is not until they grow up into real men therefore have an individual mindset will these gay porn connoisseurs truly appreciate the beauty of anal sex.

Admiration & Rewards
If you’ve ever had or witnessed straight sex in real life or in a porn scene, then you know males will put their cock in any orifice on their sex partner that they have admiration for, and that their partner will allow. Hence why straight guys besides having vaginal, (and like us) oral and anal sex, some also titty fuck their women. So gay men having anal sex is more than about there being no other hole on a male. It’s also about admiration of the beauty of the male ass. Followed by rewarding the bottom for how good he feels inside, and the top rewarding himself for finding such a great feeling bottom.

So anal sex is just like anything else. When done for the right reasons, anal sex is a beautiful thing. To watch. To feel. To hear. And even to taste. So be of a safe and sound mind, and make your beautiful anal sex adventures.

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