Formspring: Is my sex life crazy?

Is my sex life crazy? I'm either having loads of sex thrown at me (and taking it), OR I'm in a dry spell that looks like I'm trying to reclaim my virginity. Do any of you others who are single experience this?

Answer here or via Formspring. Thanks.

Possibility of Becoming The Other Man?

My next podcast will address the possibility of becoming "the other man". Has this situation ever happened to you?

If so, did you give in? And if you gave in, how did things turn out? Are you with this person now, or did it end and end badly?

Answer here or in the comments section.

Sex Party Guests Surprised With Unwanted Guests?

I was volunteering at a sex party, and later came to learn the party was being advertised on different hook-up sites with different names depending if the hook-up site is general, or for barebackers. Should I expose this party for its dual advertising, since some patrons might be hardcore about their condom use (or lack thereof) to the point a confrontation can ensue between the two? Especially if they are like I once was, - unaware of the other party and its intended patrons?

Answer here or in the comments section. I would really appreciate your help in making this decision.

You 10, We F**k A Lot In My Head

Name up to 10 porn actors who do STRAIGHT porn that you could tell the statement in the picture below to.

My 10 are: Alan Stafford, Hakan Dan, Niko, Tony DeSergio, 

Danny Wylde,

Denis Reed,

Keni Styles,

Mark Ashley,

Mr. Pete,

,

and T.J. Cummings,

Answer here or in the comments section.

That ____ Made Me Tell Me, 'I'm Gay'

As National Coming Out Day (October 11th) approaches, here is a time appropriate question for you:

Is there an image from an art form (photo, artwork, TV show, video, website, etc.) that you closely associate with the day you came out to YOURSELF? If so, what is it?

Answer here or in the comments section.

I'll answer with an update via vlog after the 1st reply.

Prelude question to "Seeing Me Before I"

Have you ever met someone attracted to you who seemed to know you were gay BEFORE you did? If so, did anything come from it, or is it now that you are out to yourself that can you admit that the attraction was mutual, and they might be the one that got away?

Answer here or in the comments section

You will get my answer tomorrow when I post my backstory and poem, "Seeing Me Before I".

PHENOMENAL Sex Antennas?

I seem to have PHENOMENAL sex when me and a guy EQUALLY choose each other. Yet, the sex is lackluster if he chose me more than I chose him. Does this mean I know a good sex partner for myself, or am I being unbending to the possibility I may be wrong?

Answer here

Secret To A Good Blowjob? (ANSWERED)

Dunkin St. Laurent, author of "Dunkin's Playground" recently asked:

"Can you nut from head?"

While I to date gave the only answer, this leads to my follow-up question:

What do you think is the secret to a good blowjob, meaning one that'll make you come?

When I first posted this question yesterday, I said that after the 1st response that I'll give an answer to my own question. First off, it's a shame that after all the hits this post has gotten so far, that it was a woman who gave an answer. So kudos to the woman who commented.

Anyway, while enthusiasm and a love of doing it are components to a good blowjob, they are not the secrets to a good one. Because you can be enthused and like doing it all you want, but if you don't do it properly, you are of no good to the recipient. So if it takes forever (or never) for him to shoot a load from you giving a blowjob, lack of skill could be part of the reason why.

While it is called "sucking dick", just putting your mouth around the cock isn't going to do much but bore him. I know because that's what it does for me. Yet too many guys wrap their mouth around the dick and nothing more. I think with so few guys lacking the proper skill, most guys you hear moaning in an orgy, sex party, or porn scene are doing so because they taught themselves that this is what's expected of them when someone attempts to give them head. Well, I'm big on being honest with myself. And if you suck at giving head, don't expect a hard-on, don't expect moaning, don't expect a rubbing of your head....because it's not fucking happening!

The secret to making a guy come from getting a blowjob is to use all parts of the mouth. Along with your lips and saliva, use a little suction to let him know you're trying to suck that man-milk produced in his balls with a thick straw called "his dick", and also use the somehow most ignored part of the mouth needed to make the best of blowjobs----the tongue.

It might surprise you to know that even though you have one, you might not have realized that the main point of sensation for a blowjob or actual intercourse is the head of the penis, especially in uncut males. But even with that being the case, you need to work the shaft as well, with your lips and tongue giving it a good massage. But do take NOTE:

Any guy trying to shove his entire shaft down your throat is overcompensating for the lack of power he has in his character.

Now back to the importance of the tongue and the head as your target. You need to tongue the head of the penis by licking it, sucking it, and slurping on it, while making the head your main focus point for combining your lips, tongue, and suction. But the part of the head that really needs the attention of your tongue and saliva is the frenulum of the penis.

When I first became sexually active, I thought that this was a sensitive area for only uncut men like myself. However, I've learned over time by the throbbing sensations and eruptions of jizz that I've caused by playing with this area on circumcised men, that it's a sensitive area on them as well.

So now you have the secret to creating a nice man-milk bath for yourself. Or (if you swallow) a protein shake.

Now, if I missed anything, feel free to answer here or in the comments section.

Formspring: Are Dancers Better In Bed?

In light of my newest dance video to be posted tomorrow, the compliments I have received in the bedroom, and compliments I have given, I decided to ask:

Do you find the rhythmic properties of dance help dancers to be better in bed? And if so, which TYPE of dancers do you find better? Those trained with the rigidness of types like ballet, OR those who are good at simply working it on the club dancefloor?

Answer here at Formspring. But I would rather you do so in  the comments section.

Diss Me On Twitter, I'll Follow You...Why?

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From HOT to TAINTED

In either real-life and with porn actors you're a fan of, does a person you once viewed as HOT, suddenly become viewed as "TAINTED" when you learn that they've been with someone that you for whatever can't stand? Thereby lose their attractiveness?

Answer here or in the comments section.

Prelude To "F**Ked Up Straight Girls"

This question is a prelude to my next blog post:

Has what you witnessed in the behavior of straight females in bars for mainly gay male patronage been FOR THE MOST PART, good or bad?

Answer here

What qualities do you look for when you're dating someone?

I look for integrity for obvious reasons. I look for a sense of self-awareness because I have no intention of playing a parent to someone. I look for a sense of humor, even about himself, because I laugh at my own screw-ups all the time, and he should do the same with himself.

What might surprise people is the fact that he doesn't necessarily have to have a job. Some years BEFORE The Recession, I once dated a guy who was unemployed, and I had no problem with his state of employment because he was striving for something. So the reason we stopped dating had nothing to do with him being unemployed, because he had another quality that I want - he was driven to go after his dreams. Our ending things however had everything to do with him being what I call an "emotional coward".

FYI - someone who constantly communicates via text messages OR always wants to escape to an FDA-approved drug for emotional issues is such a person and is NOT relationship material.

Someone I'm dating must find ALL sex beautiful. We may have a gay relationship, but he can't find straight, bi, or lesbian ugly. Straight sex is how we all got here, so he's a fuckheaded fool not to admire that. For if he doesn't admire it (or women in general), then he doesn't admire his own being.

Lastly, he CANNOT be an atheist. I have a strong belief in God, and while I admit to not being a saint or religious fanatic (far from it), my belief in God motivates the strength in my life's convictions. And he must share in having that moral compass with me.

My blog may make me seem like an open book....but maybe I'm not, so ask away ;-)

Over time, a number of White and light-complexioned ethnic porn actors have followed and/or friend requested me on various networking sites, YET you never see them paired with a Black porn actor. Who's at fault for this? The actor, the director, or both?

Over time, a number of White and light-complexioned ethnic porn actors have followed and/or friend requested me on various networking sites, YET you never see them paired with a Black porn actor. Who's at fault for this? The actor, the director, or both?

Answer here or leave answers in the Comments section.

Why You're Single: You're Hot! So Is Your Enemy!

It is an INCREDIBLY DUMB MOVE for a guy to tell you that you're hot, then when he sees a known enemy of yours, HE MAKES IT NO SECRET that he finds YOUR ENEMY to be hot as well. Sure, he may think it, but don't be dumb enough to say it aloud. AGREE or DISAGREE?

Answer here

Since gay porn is often what one in "orientation limbo" uses to see men GENUINELY at ease with their degree of being gay, do you feel that the massive marketing ploy of "gay-for-pay" contributes AT ALL to the lack of comfort causing some gay suicides?

Since gay porn is often what one in "orientation limbo" uses to see men GENUINELY at ease with their degree of being gay, do you feel that the massive marketing ploy of "gay-for-pay" contributes AT ALL to the lack of comfort causing some gay suicides?

Answer here

Do you believe in God? And regardless of your answer, would you DATE someone whose answer is the OPPOSITE of yours? I will give my answer after the 1st reply.

Since I got my 1st response here, I will now give my reply.

I long ago in a blog post revealed that I do believe in God, and chastised gays who give up that belief just because they come out as gay. What I didn't reveal is whether or not I would date someone who was an atheist.

The answer to if I could date an atheist is NO. It is not about me feeling superior as some might want to think, but there are some things that form who you are so much that having someone in your life that doesn't share that makes the relationship doomed to failed before it even begins. And I feel belief in God is one of those things.

My belief in God is what motivates the stands that I take, and while I know there are atheists who are able to take those same stands, I feel there's a passion, drive, and commitment to my convictions that my faith in God gives me that being an atheist would not. And for that reason, I can't see myself sharing a life with someone whose motivated by believing the standards and abilities they have are based totally on THEM.

For instance, I have a friend who is an atheist who said that people thanking God at award shows are lessening the importance of their part in what they've created. Well, people who believe in God have a degree of humbleness that makes us believe that it's not all about us. We believe the simple fact that we are able to wake up is a gift from God. So the fact we can breathe on our own, show off our talents and skills, and receive accolades for it are all gifts to be thankful for - and not to another mere human, but first and foremost to a higher power. By those who believe in God, an atheist thinking that those things all his/her doing is a viewpoint of arrogance, even if that atheist's normal behavior pattern shows the contrary. Hence why some God-believers seem fearful of an atheist's lack of belief in God. While for some, it may be based on a feeling of superiority. But for believers like myself (because if arrogance isn't my flaw, I do have others), it is based on my fearing the day that a situation arises that will force an atheist to reconsider his/her position. And I'm always hoping that it's not too drastic a situation.

For I have enough things to worry about in this world that can endanger the well-being of my significant other. Worrying about his basic belief system catching up to him by a higher power can't be one of them.

My blog may make me seem like an open book....but maybe I'm not, so ask away ;-)

Recently on "1 Girl, 5 Gays", one question was, "Who would you do?" with the choices being 50 Cent and Jay-Z. Most of the guys answered 50 Cent. Is it an extreme display of a lack of individual thinking to not realize that NEITHER is an option?

Recently on "1 Girl, 5 Gays", one question was, "Who would you do?" with the choices being 50 Cent and Jay-Z. Most of the guys answered 50 Cent.Is it an extreme display of a lack of individual thinking to not realize that NEITHER is an option?

Answer here

how did dancing at the cock go?

I don't feel comfortable reading sentences or answering questions that have letters in lower-case that should be capitalized. It says something about one's self-esteem, or a lacking in it of some kind. I answered one question like this, but I won't answer another. One of the questions I posed previously addressed this very matter.

I don't mean to seem bitchy, but I want you to present yourself to me and everyone else the same self-pride that I do my damnedest to present to you and my reading public. Thank you.

My blog may make me seem like an open book....but maybe I'm not, so ask away ;-)

as a black male, what do you think are the best bars to gogo in nyc?

Sadly, there aren't any I can recommend. Most bars seem to have a "light-complexion" only rule when it comes to go-go dancers. And with that rule, they allow a variety of body types (from twinks to muscular).
But as a Black male however, there is a serious problem in regards to racist imaging. For as a Black male, it seems you must be a muscle-bound gym-rat oaf, sometimes on the verge of looking like steroids are your meals instead of food, in order to be considered as a go-go dancer. That's part of the reason why I'm trying out at The Cock on Saturday. Because they practically NEVER have Black dancers there. So I'm urging people to come out and show their support so I can break this too-long-existing mold.

My blog may make me seem like an open book....but maybe I'm not, so ask away ;-)