Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Behind THAT Office Door

Do you ever wonder what happening behind an office door when you knock, and there's no answer, but you know the person's there?

Well, if you (1) have noticed the chemistry between some of your fellow employees, and (2)have your mind is in the gutter, then you're probably thinking there might be some hanky panky going on. Well, there's only 1 way to find out.

Knock - and if you get no answer, then open the door.

One day, one of my co-workers told me that my coordinator told a male paralegal that I do gay porn. Of course nothing justifies my coordinator telling him that, when I was told that all the male paralegal said about me is that I was crazy. Now, of course I don't really cares who knows. I'm not ashamed about what I do. But there is a definite hypocrisy in the corporate world, where if that info about me slips to the wrong people (like Human Resources where I do have an enemy), it can cause an unjustified legal matter to surface. I always wondered if that paralegal was going to be that person that tales of my side gig slipped from. Well, I believe after what I have to tell you, his lips have been officially sealed.

About 2 weeks ago, while doing my 3:00 mail run, I came across something. The cart I was doing had the 2nd floor on it. I went to the 2nd floor at 2:00, and went pass a female paralegal's office and the door was closed. I know either at 2 or 3 o'clock she's eating lunch in there, so this time I passed by it. But when I came around for my 3:00 run, the door was still closed. This time I knocked, but got no answer. Even with no answer, the usual protocol is to still walk into the office to check for the outgoing mail so no complaints about one's mail not being picked up comes to us later.

Maybe I should have left the door alone.

When I opened the door, I saw female paralegal sitting bent over in her chair with her back to her desk, and the male paralegal I spoke of before standing in front of her. While she uttered, "SHIT!", the male paralegal walked quickly from behind her desk with shirt tail hanging out of the zipper area of his pants trying to tuck his shirt in. I just looked at the outbox from the door, and walked out like I saw nothing.

But actually I saw plenty. Plenty enough that with all of us hopefully being all grown-ups here know what I interrupted. They should have put a sign on the door that said, "DO NOT DISTURB: BLOWJOB IN PROGRESS".

There were 3 things that struck me about them being extremely (besides horny) foolish in doing this:
(1)the office doors in the firm don't lock;
(2) it was 3:00 in the afternoon, when most of the staff is still around; therefore
(3) what if it was one of their superiors who walked into that room instead of me.

I knew stuff like this happened on the job, but I never expected to be lucky enough to walk in on it, and have some good gossip material. I wish I walked in on a rumored incident from a couple of years ago. A male and female attorney were rumored to have been caught having sex in one of the bathrooms by a partner. Now, had I caught them, since I thought the male attorney was fuckin' hot, they could have bought by silence by either letting him fucking me, or for the markdown price - they allow me to suck his dick.

I have no idea if they were reprimanded for this, and although neither one of them is still with the firm, they were definitely not fired. This brings me to wonder between that incident and the most recent one I actually did walk in on, what if it was 2 gay men that were found doing these things?

Would we only get a reprimand or would we be fired on the spot?

I have to say "we" because I still fantasized about a romp with a few of the other attorneys and paralegals on my day job. And there are still some attorneys and paralegals who if propositioned to, I would probably risk getting caught under their desk giving them a blowjob. In fact, there's one paralegal right now who seems to be somewhat flirtatious with me. Or maybe it's just my horny imagination.

The possibility of getting caught making the sex have even more of a rush was probably why they people took those risks. You may find it hard to believe, but the risk of getting caught, so far has an opposite effect on me unless I'm in a sexual environment where touching is the norm, but actual penetration is a shocker.

Catching those 2 in the act does have a drawback. Now, when I'm doing my mail runs, when I see an office door closed, I wonder what's going on behind that office door that necessitates it being closed.

Well, like I said before - there's only 1 way to find out.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Word Of Advice: Guard Your Sexual Ego

While I try to be true to my word and advise the up-and-comers in the adult industry, this blog entry is for you. And for the rest of you, it can bring you another step closer to what helped me make the decision to no longer work for Tyson Cane. So in other words, after these tales, there will still be more to tell as to what led up to the final straw.

Now, to help the up-and-cummers.

From the moment you step on a porn set, you need to know what you're capable of doing, and if you are not sure, then let your producer and director know that. It's more to your advantage that you know because (1)a director most likely doesn't want to be your sex ed teacher telling you what you like as an individual, so knowing can lead to more work; and (2)not all directors have professionalism as their forte, and they may say some insulting things about the abilities you are more than aware of the fact that you have.

Such was the case with Tyson Cane on the set of "The Interview". Tyson told one of my co-stars that they are "not a very good top".

What makes this such a prime example of a director lacking professionalism?

(1)He said this in front of me and a guest; and (2)my co-star has worked before as a top, in movies for another company, and for Tyson Cane as well, which most likely is why he was made a Tyson Cane Exclusive.

Being eyewitness to this greatly offended me, because like in mainstream entertainment, when a director inappropriately insults one of your co-stars, he ruins the good vibe that should be on the set. And on a porn set, a good vibe is tantamount to making a good scene. It offended me so that at one point Tyson Cane insulted me during the shoot. He made a comment about how long it takes me to cum, then insisted on mocking me for it. I have said in the past that I am not to fond on Tyson Cane's taste in men, and since the perfect example of that for me was my scene partner in "The Booth". He was who I was talking about in my blog entry for Pitbull, "My Little Death : Interrupted". Now with that being the case, wouldn't you take a while to shoot your load? So this time, he finally has not just 1, but 3 guys that are my taste, so cumming should be easier. Just like it was easy for the 5-man orgy in "69 Fuck Street". I was the 2nd one to shoot their load. But Tyson messed it up by ruining up the vibe on the set with how he treated my co-stars on this set (and past sets), plus his verbal attack on me, and all this was getting to be the last straw. I was trying for the cumshot, then he asked me if I was going to come, and I decided he doesn't deserve what I have to offer, so I point blank told him, "NO".

If he made a better vibe on his set that wouldn't have been an issue. I'm the type of person who has enough inner-strength that I don't get hurt by the hurtful and insulting things people say to me. Instead, I get angered by the possible injury those words can do to my spirit or that of my fellow man. And that was the case here. Thank God for my being self-assured, because his words could have cause my sexual ego some serious injury. And that's why I'm advising you up-and-cummers to go on a porn set self-assured of your abilities. So unwarranted verbal attacks don't bruise your sexual ego, because if it does, you may take your hurt beyond the set and into your personal sex life.

Porn actors are exhibitionists, and the director is supposed to be your voyeur, so knowing that he/she is watching and enjoying it is supposed to get you off. Your director should never say things to you that may possibly make you feel less than sexually well-equipped, UNLESS you did some false advertising of what you could deliver, and have no video credit to back it up. But after 6 movies, that is not the case with me. And I want the same for you.

I hope this advice helps all of you up-and-cummers. I give these words of advice so that I can beat my meat to you guys and feel that without a shadow of a doubt that the pleasure moans you're giving in your scenes are 100% real. So go out there, know how great a fuck you are, and make it my pleasure to beat my meat to you.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Model For Art and/or Blasphemy?

This past Sunday proved to be a very busy day for me as well. For starters, after I went to see my friends one-man show at BAAD. A few of us got on the 6 train, went to the East Village, and went to Nowhere. The rush of new happenings didn't even stop there, because as I was ordering a beer for my friend, the bartender told me that some guy paid for the beer. I've never had someone across from me in a bar pay for my drink before, so I had no idea of what the proper etiquette was in this situation. And neither did my friends. There was nothing really wrong with the guy from what I saw. It's just that Saturday gave me such a rush, and I felt Sunday was going to be the same way, so I not only wanted, but needed this to be my cool out period.

Smart move on my part, because Sunday was exactly as I expected.

I decided to go spend the afternoon at Daniel Nardicio's Sundays @ The Bijou again, and get in some model drawing there was a chance I may actually end up modeling. You see, on the Friday before, Daniel put out a bulletin asking if someone wanted to be a model for Sunday. I replied a little too late, because Daniel replied saying that he already told someone else "yes", but there's a chance he might back out, and if he does, he would let me know ASAP. So I went to the Bijou Sunday thinking that I was going to draw the model, but my 6th sense knew that I would be the model. As soon as I walked in the door, Daniel saw me telling me the guy never showed. So I got undressed and waited for someone to come by pick up a pad and pencil, and make magic on paper with me as their subject.

While waiting, I met Chaz and Lonni, better known as Whore's Mascara. They walked by with Daniel and saw me waiting on the bar. Lonni made me especially nervous because if it wasn't for being a little taller and heavier, he's almost a dead ringer for a Polish/Russian guy I tricked about 8 months after I discovered my sexuality 5 years ago. What makes it more intense is that guy was the 1st person that I declared as the best sex I ever had at that time. Now, considering how I've come to realize that just as most people who look alike tend to act alike, and the same seems to hold true for sexual performance, I had to put my mind on other things to avoid my dick from standing at attention.

Only 1 guy came by to draw me. He said he hadn't drawn in years. Well, from what you see here, drawing for him was like riding a bike - he didn't forget a thing.
With no other takers, I just hung out. Then Daniel asked me about appearing at his after-party for the Gay Erotic Expo. Due to what I wrote in my blog about the Bijou, and seeing the trailer for Dark Alley Media "PASSIO", he wasn't sure because of my religious convictions as to whether or not I'd be OK doing what he was about to ask. To promote "PASSIO", he asked if I minded being tied to the cross totally naked like Danny Fox was in the movie. Consciously, I have no idea why, but I responded with a bright and shiny, "Sure." He told me that people would be able to walk by and touch me and suck on my dick, which is pretty much how Danny Fox is done in the movie.

With my religious convictions, you would think I would have turned my nose up at this, but I think my subconsciousness played a big part in that. For (1) I tend to like the extremities of Daniel's parties, so this was a way to be a part of that; (2)I knew when the go-go boys brought me in to be tied to the cross that the sight of what may be perceived as a black Jesus was going to throw many for a loop, and I love shocking people; and lastly (3)it gave me an insight into bondage, and that's something I've never tried before.

I have to admit, I did get quite turned on while up there. I was there on display for the crowd. "I'm all yours, so touch me, rub me, suck me all you want, because I have no say in the matter" is basically what my body was saying while being tied to that cross. And being typical fashion of why I nicknamed myself "The L XTreme" in my non-porn life, it would take an extreme measure to make me try bondage. And the exploration of bondage is what I kept in my head after I agreed to this. My religious convictions did make me question it. But based on the story description, I tried to see it from the gay erotic artist perspective of what if there was some other way for Jesus than to go through such an ordeal. Which is actually a question every person told that Christian tale should have asked themselves at one point or another.

I was on that cross for about 30 - 45 minutes, then I went to enjoy the party. I did make out with one guy who felt me up while I was on the cross. He was so adorable, I had to grab on him what he grabbed on me. I guess that's the part of bondage that makes it hot. All the pent-up energy in your hands to repay your sex partner for all the pleasure he/she gave you, but being unable to reciprocate because you were tied up.

As you can see, I had quite the weekend. I think this weekend will be a more tame one. Believe me, after last week, I need another weekend with that many adrenaline rushes just yet.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Getting Out The Kinks: Springing From Nature's Hose

This is the picture that started it all for me. It's a photo by Pierre et Gilles that I first saw in the book, "The Male Nude" by David Leddick some years before fully realizing my sexuality. Something in me saw this hot guy holding his dick while pissing, and wanted to hold it, and play with the piss as it sprouted from his beautiful cock. Maybe since I wasn't sexually active at the time, a part of me felt like that was disgusting. But I knew even then that I was that because that's what most people expect you to say in order to feel your sexual behavior is respectable. So that part of me was complying, which you should see by now is nothing like me. The other part of me therefore was the real "me". The part that thought to feel his dick wet from his piss was hot. Once I became sexually active, my thirst grew to find out if this was just a fantasy of how I would feel should such a chance ever present itself, or would it be a kink that I would fully embrace.

Once again - enter the Jersey Boys.
At one of our trysts, we were sitting around naked taking a break, and they asked me if I was into watersports. I told them I was curious about it, but never tried it. So I got my chance that day. We went in the bathroom and C pulled out his thick dick, and started pissing. I loved watching the piss stream from his cock, and when M went and tasted it, I decided to go even further with this sexual exploration and taste it myself. I will admit that tasting is the one part of watersports I don't do too often when I do it. But I will let a guy piss on my body, and maybe even in. Such as once when I was with the Jersey Boys, C was fucking me, and realized he needed to piss. Out of curiosity of the sensation, I told him to pull out, put some of the head of his dick back in, and go. I got so turned on by his warm piss running between my legs. And believe me, not only the fact that I was turned on surprised me, but the fact of how much I was turned on surprised me as well. That would explain by you see the link on my links page for the website "Fully Clothed Pissing". Or why I am so turned on by pics like these:

Now I'm don't only have a kink for watersports. I'm not only turned on by watching piss shoot out of a guy's cock. I also love watching a guy shoot a cum load. But what guy gay or straight doesn't? It symbolizes that whoever (be they a man or awoman) that guy was fucking has a damn good hole. And the theory is most likely, "the greater the load, the sweeter the hole."
That might expalin why you see in my video on my trailers page, I describe myself as a"cum connosieur" while I'm licking the head of Dillon's dick. It was probably me patting myself on the back after he fucked the living daylights out of me. And I have done that to other guys I've been with.

I guess it boils down to what I've believe I've stated before about myself. I love nature. So that plus my love of the beauty of a cock, can explain why I have such a fascination with the natural fluid that springs from them, because that's a cock's purpose - to be a natural spring. I know I probably take it a step further by adoring the sight of piss and cum oozing and/or shooting out of a guy's cock. But hey, I'm an extremist, and that's what we extremist do.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

There's A Reason They Are Called "QUEENS"

If the tone at the end of my last post sounds like I’m insulting size queens, then I said it right. Besides materialistic shitheads, size queens are another problem within the gay male community. The reason there is no such thing as a size KING is because a king is meant to be a real man. And no real man is going to fault a guy for having a small penis. It is an act of nature beyond his control. Maybe, if the unattached guys stop following the porn-induced fallacy of how “bigger is better” they would have a hole that could find pleasure in a smaller cock like I have. The problem is that all those guys who followed that porn-induced fallacy now have assholes stretched out wide as the Grand Canyon, so all their bodies can accommodate is a big cock. Now, this is meant to sound insulting for those single guys who will play with only large cocks. If you are a guy in a long-term relationship and your boyfriend or life-partner just happens to have a big cock, that remark is not meant for you, because your body is then just forming the accommodate your significant other. BUT if part of the reason why you chose him is because of the reason like the shallow wide-holed single guys, then YES that insult goes for you, too.

Some quick advice:
If you don’t want that loose wide hole that makes it so easy for me to insult you, then try to stay tight by doing some kegels.

Kegels may very well be the reason why I have dated and tricked with men of various cocks sizes with practically all of them claiming how tight I am. I have been with guys probably about 5” long to guys about 11”. And some guys whose cocks are thin to guys thick like the Frenchman, which is the thickest cock I have ever been fucked by. I brought up the variety of sizes of men I’ve been with to show that I try my best to be someone who practices what they preach. My only requirement for the guy I lust to be fucked by is that he has a dick to fuck me with. Nothing more.

Earlier, I said that the idea of how “bigger is better” is a porn-induced fallacy. More gay porn than straight porn actually. And many of you may find it strange for this criticism to come from a Porn Actor who is a bottom on-camera. But you need to remember, since I've been writing this blog, I have taken risks by telling many truths that need to be told, and this is no different. Because it’s true, and I would so love to change that from being the case. I would like to for once be fucked on-camera by a guy(s) with average or what may be considered below average size cock(s), and be totally honest with my reaction. And I’m sure that my reaction will most likely show me loving every thrust made into my ass, because I seem to have a knack for picking guys who are good in bed. Of the guys I’ve had off-camera, (besides the drug-induced fuckers who couldn’t get it up or keep it up) I only had one guy who was just OK. Every other guy, be they a guy I was dating or a trick, knew how to lay that pipe (be it big or small) in my ass in a way that blew my mind.

I feel that porn studios who encourage that falsehood, are just as much of a danger to scarring men’s sexual self-image, as the fashion industry is a danger to women’s self-image by encouraging that being rail-thin is the way to go. Although the falsehood by the fashion industry actually leads to death, the fact that both hurt a person’s self-image makes their actions appalling. I am so sick and fucking tired of getting spam email trying to send me to a website to buy male enlargement pills or penis pumps, because it’s a sign. A sign that there are men whose sexual self-image have been bruised to the point that they are buying into this bullshit, and buying these products. Because if they weren’t buying into it, these spam emails would stop, being that these companies had to pack it in for lack of business.

I wonder how much better in bed are the guys who do buy these products. I doubt they’re much better. In fact, I bet they’re worst. Before buying that penis pump or taking that pill, they probably could lay a fuck on you that would make you orgasm from head to toe. That is if you’re man enough to not be a size queen. Now, if they seem better, it’s probably all in the person’s mind. I would most likely find them lousy because he’s not working with the beautiful rod God gave him, because what God gave him was custom made to fit him and his skills as a lover. And like I said before, I like nature, so any man-made adjustment, especially to the penis will lessen that for me.

Just to reassure some of you that there is nothing wrong with you, I myself have been told that my cock isn’t big enough to be a top by Tyson Cane. It was in a conversation where I wasn’t even asking about topping in one of his movies, but he presented that insult to me anyway being the no-tact low-class ass that I now admit he is. I’ll get more into the entire conversation in my next blog entry for my “Word of Advice” series. My point is that what he said to me could have seriously bruised my sexual ego, as someone saying it to some of you may have led you to buy some enlargement pills or invest in a penis pump. But I was secure enough with myself to not let his ignorance get to me. I was angered by his remark because of what it could have done to me if I was less secure with my sexual ego. That’s why size queens should not run porn studios.

This is what I told myself that day. Now you re-word that in whatever way you need to depending on your preferred sexual position, “I am a versatile bottom. I love to get fucked in the ass, and I sometimes like to fuck ass, and I have a willing and able dick to prove it when I choose to.”

Even some straight women know that bigger isn’t always better. I mean I have picked up quite a few Playgirl magazines over the years, and I jerked off to many a hot guy from their pages who is not so well-endowed. And as successful as Playgirl is, they must be on to something. So you’re going to let straight women show the world that our male sex appeal is not only, if at all in the size of our cocks? That’s why the size queens of the gay male community are just that - queens. They are unfit to be at the top like the KINGS, because their not smart enough. Kings are real men who don’t make penis size a requirement to display a man as a stud. A king’s only rule regarding a penis is that the man has one to display.

Don’t get me wrong. I do enjoy the sight of a big cock, and I revel in the challenge of taking on each long and/or thick one on any hot guy I see. The insults I have thrown out in this post are for those that make it a requirement for a sexual partner, which I do not. We as gays have enough judgments made against us by straight society, so to make judgments against one another on something as superficial as penis size is one of many ways gay men become their own worst enemy. In short, it’s time for us as a whole to get our shit together.

So what are you going to help us to be – a community of queens or KINGS?

French Kiss, Big Bliss?

A couple of Fridays ago, I went to Splash. Yes, I hate Splash’s over-muscled go-go boys and majority of clientele being Chelsea boys, but not their choice in DJs. So I went there to dance, and while taking a break from dancing, I saw a guy that I had noticed while I was on the dance floor. He walked right pass me, on the dance floor, but while standing on the side taking a break, he seemed to notice me. Being as shy as I am, I wasn’t sure if it was just my imagination or not, so I let time reveal the truth. He was on the outskirts of the dance floor at this time, standing there with a friend. There was a guy sitting on a stool not too far from me, and when that guy got up, this guy took his place. Once again, thinking it was my imagination, I saw him move the stool a little bit closer to me before he sat down. That’s when the real eye contact started.

We kept looking at each other, and I kept turning away smiling. Then he took the initiative and came over to me and said, “We could either keep looking at each other, or one of us could say something.”

Did I forget to mention he turned out being a Frenchman, which considering the racism of the typical White male New Yorker I've been experiencing (especially in Splash), this did not surprise me.

We made our introductions with me giving my legal name, and made out feeling each other up. Now since his arrangements while visiting New York made having an overnight guest a rude move, it was either my place in Jersey City or part ways imagining the great sex we could have had. My reason for pause was because a heating system was just installed in my place about a day before, and between my having to move furniture out the way for them to work, and these cut-rate plumbers making even more of mess, I once again wound up bringing someone back to my place when it’s a mess. And when I gave him warning before we left Splash, his response was, “Do you have a bed?”

I said, “Yes”.

“Do you have a bathroom?”

I said, “Yes.”

“Then that’s all we need.”

And from there we made the trek back to my place.

He started groping me from the gate of my brownstone to the door of my room. And I was not going to stop him, because it only made me more hungry for his naked body to get joined with mine. So as soon as I closed my door, we started getting undressed. Now, I felt his hard cock through his jeans while at Splash, but when I saw it outside of his jeans, I was in for a shock, because his cock was so thick, and he was not that much taller than me, but he had nicely defined muscles. And it seems that when his muscles were developing, they went down to his cock. His cock was what most would call a pretty good length, but his thickness is what made what some would call a “monster cock”. It was thick as one porn star I would love to get fucked by, Justin Christopher. I know how thick Justin Christopher is because I saw his hard-on when I was a "sextra" in Michael Lucas’ La Dolce Vita.

But that thick dick isn’t why I would love to get fucked by him, nor did it make the Frenchman anymore attractive.
It’s their gorgeous face, nice asses, and hot bod that draws me to them in that order. Their big dicks is just as big a surprise to me as if it was small.

I didn’t know that the Frenchman had such a thick dick until he got naked at my place. And if it was 5 inches long and 4” thick, I would have still bottomed for him. I will admit the 2 times we had sex, it was amazing. But I think it was amazing to me because he knew how to work that long thick cock of his. I think it would have still been just as good if it was 5” long and 4” thick because he plain and simply knows how to fuck.

Now had he been 5” by 4”, some size queens would have made up some reason to send him on his way. And the stupidity it takes for gay men to do that is exactly why they are called, “size queens”, and not “size kings”.

To be continued…..

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Sunday Afternoon @ The Bijou

Yesterday, I went to The Bijou for Daniel Nardicio’s new Sunday afternoon event there. I got there in time to catch a peek at RuPaul’s movie STARBOOTY, which seems like it’s going to be very funny, so I’m looking forward to getting a copy when the DVD comes out on October 30th.

Afterwards, before the main feature, CALIGULA, there was a trailer for Dark Alley Media’s upcoming controversial film, PASSIO. Now, many of you may know that I am a God-believing man, so this movie may seem hard for me to take. But I have to confess, I may have to get a copy of this one because that trailer looked incredibly hot and made me incredibly horny. Maybe it has something to do with how those religious paintings I saw growing up always gave me a guilt-ridden arousal with their display of nearly naked men, and PASSIO looks like those pictures come to life. Especially Danny Fox with his erect cock and hot booty bump on his nice, sweaty, and gorgeous bod seen in right profile. Now if you don’t know how I love wet hot bods, find out here. I thought I was going to have to slip out and beat my meat just by watching the trailer. Imagine the guilty pleasure it’s going to be for me if I see the whole movie.

Once CALIGULA started, I watched to see how controversial a movie it was for its time. The beginning looks R-rated, so I was wondering that the controversy I had heard about this movie was all about. I didn’t watch the whole movie from beginning to end. I had stopped at one point to check out the rest of the Bijou, and also to take part in their drawing class featuring a nude model from But what I did see later on in the film was definitely something that surprised me. I didn’t expect to see actual penetration, but there it was – dicks sliding in and out of pussies and mouths. There was even a cumshot during a blowjob. I was wondering if it was real or fake, because the guy’s cock was still in her mouth during the cumshot. So it could have been just some liquid they made up to look like cum, and even if it was that was an extreme move to show that for it’s time. Heck all these years later, what was seen in SHORTBUS is considered extreme.

And speaking of SHORTBUS, who did I see during the drawing class but “The Jamies”, P.J. Deboy and Paul Dawson who was sitting right next to me. And the Rentboy who was our drawing subject was pornstar
Dimitri Santiago.

The drawing class was the part of this event that I was looking forward to the most. As some of you may know, I draw as well. That is of course how I designed my jacket in my gallery “
Tré by Tré”, so drawing is not a problem for me. The problem that I needed the practice for was my drawing an actual body, and even more practice was needed by me to draw a face. I have drawn my own face in the past, and even designed a shirt based on a song I wrote some years ago using a singer’s face from a CD cover and adding details to it. But like I said it’s been awhile, and I’ve been thinking about doing some erotic drawings lately, so I needed this to get in the practice of drawing physiques. I think I did OK, but I’m looking forward to doing better next time. See for yourself.

Watching Dimitri pose took me back a year ago when I modeled at the Tom of Finland Erotic Art Fair. And with his last pose putting me directly in line with him, I was trying my best to not make him self-conscious while I focus on his facial features like his eyes, eyebrows, and nose. And when he asked for a suggested position, I didn’t want to say anything that would be hard to hold, because I remember how holding a pose seemed easy at first, but when you least expect it, your muscles feel like they are going to give way.

During the last 2 poses I definitely had the best seat in the house according to my personal taste. This drawing is of the 3rd pose, and being the butt-man that I am, you know I was as happy as a pig in slop to have his booty bump directly in front of me. So as far as I’m concerned, anyone with a spot to the right of mine that ends up directly behind him was someone I considered lucking out on getting a good viewing spot.

Well, they say “practice makes perfect” so I’m going to try and be there next week, but with the Gay Erotic Expo coming this weekend, I may have to put off my next chance to practice until the following week. Either way, I must say THANKS Daniel for coming up with another great idea.

Friday, October 12, 2007

Porno Bingo, Cheer NY, and Me

THANK YOU to all of you who came out Wednesday night to Will Clark’s PORNO BINGO. Everyone there really helped it to be a become a fun night for me. But for a moment, it didn’t look like it would be contributing much beyond my presence.

The movie “69 Fuck Street” came out at the end of July, so with the night for my scheduled appearance at Porno Bingo was nearing, around the end of August, I sent an email to Owen Hawk at Dark Alley Media to try to get copies. Now, if you recall, “69 Fuck Street” is by Man-Size by Private, but I was cast into the movie by Dark Alley Media, who was a sub-contractor for the movie. I waited a couple of days, and got no response, which worried me because when I usually email Owen on business matters, I have always in the past got a quick response. But all wasn’t lost I thought because I also had Dark Alley’s Marketing Director James Ian’s email address, so I contacted him. The next day, I got a call from
Pure Play Media, the distributor of Man-Size by Private, saying that James forwarded my email to them, and that got the ball rolling. Once I heard their willingness to help, I began to rest easy, knowing that I owe James a big THANK YOU for forwarding my email to Pure Play Media.

All the stuff from Pure Play Media took longer than expected to get to me. So I sent emails and phone calls to check on the progress, and everything became straightened out. I will admit that I at one point became so frazzled that the last time I called them on September 26th, they gave me a tracking number to check on the shipment online, and when I went to the website, it turned out the package was to arrive on September 27th. So if I had just waited a day, I wouldn’t have been on the verge of freaking out. So THANKS Pure Play Media for the goodies, and putting up with my neurosis.

When Will Clark asked me to pick a night to be guest-caller at Porno Bingo, I saw on the list he gave me all the beneficiaries, and
Cheer NY at the time was not confirmed. I told him if Cheer NY get confirmed for October 10th, then that’s the night I do it. I felt they deserved that due to how the Porn Actor who was the guest-caller on the night they were the beneficiary behaved. He wasn’t an ass. He just wasn’t professional about his appearance. He had his boyfriend with him, and that’s fine. BUT when you are making an appearance, you need to make yourself accessible to the crowd even if you have your significant other and friends accompanying you, and he didn’t. He stayed in the back of the bar with his boyfriend and a couple of friends, and when he wasn’t hiding in the back of the bar, he was repeatedly outside smoking with his boyfriend. After witnessing that, and knowing how much of a crowd-pleaser Cheer NY is at Porno Bingo, I decided to make it up to them, because they deserve better. So I made myself approachable, I didn’t go disappearing. In fact, I stayed in front of the bar most of the night.

There weren’t many people there when I arrived, so the energy wasn’t quite there, which had me worried at first. But as the more crowd and members of Cheer NY came in, the energy grew immensely. And having the athletic hunks and damsels of Cheer NY to look at being as high energy as I anticipated didn’t hurt in making that happen at all. So I was very glad I chose to appear that night.

I was worried as to how much of my clothes would come off depending on how much money we raise. But I thought back on my past solo appearances, and how time I wound up taking more off. My last solo appearance I only got my shirt off, but I was hoping this time around to go all the way and lose all my clothes. The deal Will and myself agreed upon then made with the crowd is that at $250 I would lose my shirt, at $400 I would lose my pants, and at $500 I would lose my underwear. I wore the overalls that I wore in “Oh Boy Escorts 2”, so losing my clothes would be quite easy. As I told Will Clark about them, “easy access”. I always wear those overalls when I’m going somewhere that I need to slip out of my clothes fast, like a go-go dancing gig, a porn shoot, or an event like this. I knew it would be long before losing the shirt because after the 1st round we had already raised $106, then another $100 by the second round, and people donating to get the total up to $250. So I did my striptease of opening the overalls then taking off the shirt I had on underneath. I opened up my belt buckle so that the overall would hang low enough to give patrons the incentive to give more so they can get a look at “what lies beneath”.

By the fourth round, the total was over $400. Although that was enough to make me drop trou, Will and Cheer NY egged the crowd to get up to $500 so that I can lose it all. Well, the hunks of Cheer NY also upped the ante, by offering to drop trou themselves while I lose all my clothes.

No argument from me, that’s for sure.
Especially considering that all these guys should be pornstars themselves because they are a picture of what American gay porn should be. A line-up of good-looking guys with fit bods coming in a rainbow of colors and ethnicities.

Well, with some doing, we did reach the $500 mark. So while I stripped standing on the piano stool, the guys were behind me dropping their pants. And while stripping, I made sure to turn around every once in a while to get a view from above of all the cute butts in their skivvies. Remember, they’re cheerleaders, so their bodies are nothing to scoff at unless you’re jealous.

Which makes me have to give a special thanks to one of the guys who got about as naked as me. In fact, after Porno Bingo wrapped, we wound up making out, and one of the other members briefly came in and made it a 3-way kiss. Now, there are times when someone making your 1-on-1 kiss a 3-way can piss you off.

This was DEFINITELY NOT one of those times. So my advice to him: If that happens again, next time - stay longer. Like from start to finish.

So once again THANKS to the patrons for making it a great night. THANKS to Cheer NY for being such great sports. THANKS to A.B. for the photos. THANKS to Manny for the drinks. And THANKS to Will Clark for the invite.You can soon see photos at

Friday, October 5, 2007

Come See Me @ PORNO BINGO-10/10/2007

For those of you in NY, I hope to see many of you come this Wednesday night at Will Clark's PORNO BINGO.

This is a very special one for me, because the DVD that is part of the prize is "69 Fuck Street", which is my 1st and only travel outside of the ethnic-themed porn genre to date. I have finally seen the finished product for myself, and I am quite proud of my work. I'm proud of most of my projects, but I always welcome change, and this one suit me well. In fact, this movie has a racial makeup that's more like my life off-camera.
So come on down meet me, and have a chance to win a copy of "69 Fuck Street", as well as get DVD Samplers from PRIVATE MAN.

by buying Bingo cards, you help to support the evening's beneficiary Cheer NY.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Drugs Wear At Associates, Too

After coming under some scrutiny for mentioning someone's drug use. I think I have to address this issue more fully. And in doing so, I will be admitting to my mistakes even more so than before.

First off, they say go with your 1st instinct. And my 1st instinct in responding to Rich's 1st comment to say that his claiming that I'm airing someone's private life in their drug use is fuckin' ludicrous. But instead I took a more peaceful approach.
Now after looking back at it. I see I was right the 1st time.

Rich's comment was FUCKIN' LUDICROUS.

I'm not insulting Rich. I'm just being honest, and I will most definitely explain why.

To Rich and those of you who agree with him to some degree:
(1))You need to read more carefully. I said that my feelings about a sexual partner's drug use didn't cross my mind much until after this incident. Therefore, it never crossed my mind to walk out at the time as it very well should have.
Also, I said before that I orginally was not going to write about that tryst at all. The reason the bar became mentioned in the first post about my dancing there was simply me doing some self-promotion. And once things did not work out as they should have, I decided to update my readers on the situation with the bar and the bartender, as their comments expressed interest in both. And being that a lesson about drugs could be learned by my botched tryst with the bartender, I decided to write it.
(2)You need to look beyond the surface of things. I ALREADY SAID that this was just an intended roll in the hay. And I compared it to a car accident for a reason. Because the fact is either way, be it the reality or the proposed scenario, his being with me did not lead to the intended outcome because of drugs. In the reality - a great sexaul encounter, in the proposed scenario - me reaching my destination safely. So my point is this time - it was only a botched roll in the hay, tomorrow - it could be that devastating car accident.

With all that being said, the reason I said Rich's comment was FUCKIN' LUDICROUS was because this incident happened while this guy was with me. And being that he was with me, it rightfully stirred an emotion within me. Therefore, I have EVERY RIGHT to vent his drug usage. If he does drugs when he is not around me, or I don't wind up seeing the effects of his drug use, THEN Rich would be right - I am to keep my mouth shut.

Now, in defense of the bartender, the next day after our inteneded tryst, he told me that he was taking steps to no longer do drugs, even the little bit that he was doing. When I told him that I had written the blog about our night together, I did not tell him that I mentioned his drug use, and how it put a cramp in our night together. I told him that I was extremely honest, and that it should keep him doing what he's doing, because he said he was sticking to his regimen of not doing any. For that I commend him, and if he was upset by my last entry, being that I was honest and have now explained how and why as much info about him surfaced as it did, I hope he will understand.
But since I know that what I wrote may have possibly made someone or some people take a look at themselves the way I did after this incident, I'm sorry, but I will make no apologies.

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