HX Awards 2008 - My Highs, My Lows

I went to the HX Awards this past Monday. Last year was my 1st time going, and I went with a friend. This year, I went solo, knowing that I was going to be running into some of the new faces that have entered my world within the past year, so I wouldn't be spending too much time looking like a lonely wallflower. I ran into Jeff Eason of WilsonModels.com. He was making the rounds taking photos, and we kept running into each other.

I also ran into Lady Clover Honey and her friend, Howie. Through Clover, I came face to face with actor/director Casper Andreas ("Slutty Summer", "A Four Letter Word"). Let me put it this way - there are some people who you see on a TV or movie screen and you think they are gorgeous, but when you meet them in person, you think to yourself, "Oh my gosh! -

- YOU ARE FUCKIN' GORGEOUS!"

I believe I've said it before that I love passing the compliments someone gives me on to someone else. And just how people say I'm a combination of good-looks and talent, I have to pass that on to Casper Andreas. Although, I never said it to his face, because (1)I'm quiet when meeting people for the 1st time; (2)how can I say something when he's with someone who I'm not sure is his boyfriend or platonic friend. If he was his boyfriend, it would have been a bit rude to say, "Hi, I'm Tré. I must say your man is both talented, and I have to say - scrumptious; and (3)I was in awe of the fact that I came in contact with someone of a more mainstream talent that I admire, because that doesn't happen too often. Not even when I was in mainstream entertainment myself.

While meeting Casper Andreas was one high point of my night, another was seeing Daniel Nardicio win the Spirit Award. I admire anyone who (whether willingly or incidentally) creates something to undo the repression of sexuality that so many levels of government try to impose upon us, thereby overstepping their bounds. That's why when Daniel asks me to go-go for him, or get tied to a cross and allow my dick to get sucked by horny party patrons - Brother, I am soooo there, using certain body parts to tell the government what they can do with themselves. My pointed hard-on is my flipping the bird, and my bare butt is telling them to "Kiss it, Bitches! And don't miss not one bit of each cheek."

Keep up the good work, Daniel.

Now with every high, there must come 1 or more lows. In this case, it was seeing Perez Hilton win for Best Blog. While I don't really know the other blogs nominated to a great degree, but considering that Perez Hilton has become notorious for outing celebrities, it makes me concerned about the degree of humanity within New York's gay community.

I hate to get on my soapbox here, but this must be said.

I never have, or ever will be OK with celebrities being outed. Mainstream entertainers are trying to obtain recognition for their talent as mainstream performers, not their sexual orientation. They are not porn actors, like myself, who get paid to put their sexual orientation on display (which is why I hate the whole gay-for-pay genre). So anyone who forces a mainstream entertainer into being recognized for their orientation against that entertainer's will is a person beneath being considered human. And anyone who supports such acts puts their character in jeopardy of becoming the same.

I really hope that Perez Hilton winning that award was a sick joke played by voters, and not a sign of a severe lack of humanity within New York gay community that him winning that award based on gay New Yorker's true sentiments would indicate. Maybe it is a joke. Because Perez sent in a videotaped acceptance speech, and after a while many of the audience started booing. I'm hoping it because they wanted the trifling thing that he is to get off the screen, and not only because of his incessant rambling.

I wrapped up the night by going to the after-party at Barracuda. Where Miss Drag Queen of the Year Award Winner, Peppermint turned it out for a 2nd time, as if Peppermint would do anything else but. The 1st time was actually the final perfomance at the HX Awards.

Well, there you have the highs and lows of my night at the HX Awards. Let's see what happens next year. Until then....

As Pride Rolls In, My Thanks

I wanted to take a moment to say THANKS to so many of you for your support in regards to my posting about the lack of Asians in American gay porn. The overwhelming response was totally unexpected, and one thing I really enjoy seeing are comments by people within the industry. So often I feel as if I'm the voice of many in the industry, but the only one with a backbone to say what needs to be said, risking my porn career in the process. I was glad to see others take the same risk by making those feelings public that industry big wigs could be threatened by by being inept human beings.

Being that it is Pride Week here in New York, my having to say this comes at the right time.

Because accepting ourselves and each other as gays inside and out is what Pride Week is all about. We are to have pride in ourselves, and that helps to find the inner and outer beauty in others, no matter what body type, creed, or ethnicity.

That is the reason I come off with such venomous anger in blogs about racism in the American gay porn industry, because the pushing aside of other ethnicities shows the producers and directors lack of pride and insecurities about themselves and their own sexual prowess, so other ethnicities with skin color or facial features that stray too far from them are considered a threat that they need to shut out and treat as if they don't exist. And if they do acknowledge someone with such a difference, it's only to present a token figure in the mix. That is not only showing a lack of gay pride, but an even more extreme lacking in human pride.

I want to see that gay and human pride shown in some American-made porn. The big names are obviously too out of touch to show that pride in truth, with their participation in some Pride Week events. And although most porn is done on the West Coast, I sadly have to make that same claim about some movie and management companies in my own backyard of the East Coast.

Maybe they'll get it right someday, but until then, I urge you to go to your pride events and praise those who truly show the meaning of pride. The same way you support me as I try to show my pride, and for which I greatly appreciate you for being.

HAPPY PRIDE!

Portrait Of A Corporate Meltdown

There's a video I want you to see if you haven't already. For whatever reason, with Blogger, it comes up with erros because of certain words in the embeding code, and it won't let me post it. So go to this link, and see it for yourself. Because ome people may find this video amusing, and it is....

http://www.break.com/index/office-worker-goes-absolutely-insane.html

....until you realize that the guy in the video could be you, or practically anyone you know.

This is a clear picture of the meltdown that Corporate America is bringing into so many lives. Although this video is said to be fake, the man's display of lost control is something I sense to possibly explode in so many people around me at "KLLP". And I sense it just walking down the streets of New York City. Especially when I'm surrounded by people who are obviously deep in the corporate world. It is an extreme darkness I even see in myself, while as A Mail Clerk, I'm a low-man on the totem pole. And this is why I use this blog to vent my anger. An anger I have to bury almost everyday, so it doesn't surface, and I become just like that man in the video ---- or worse.

I have mentioned in some previous blogs my disdain for the corporate scene, but never got into details about some of the reasons for that disdain.

The hypocrisy, which I'll display with a small example. I clearly see everyday when I walk around the Financial District of Downtown Manhattan where corporate people always make demands of how they want something fast, fast, fast, and now, now, now, YET when it's time for them to move fast, fast, fast, and now, now, now they are too often the most slothful creatures on the planet. Hence the reason so many corporate jobs now include gym memberships in their benefits package. Because while their pockets are getting full, so are their stomachs at the expense of the lesser paid person who usually has even more common sense and humanity and doing all the physical work that could ward off that increasing bulge.

Another reason for my corporate disdain is the humanity that I said the lesser paid person tends to have, and the CEOs tend to lack. I'm not saying that all people at the top are void of humanity. But it is obvious that there are way too many who are with the increasing problem of things like outsourcing forcing American employees of big corporations to lose their job, then wind up sometimes homeless. It takes an extreme lack of humanity to already be rich, but be so greedy for more that you'll take a job away from someone in your homeland who needs it, and give it to someone in another country for a lesser rate of pay.

What bothers me also is the fact that every year, colleges have graduates hungry to be a part of that disastrous corporate machine. Even at the firm I work at, we have summer associates come in every year, most with the same uppity attitude. But with a future that seems to be plagued with such inhumanity, my question to these people is: What do you have the right to be uppity about? Are you making more money? Sure, but at what price. You're so busy trying to stay ahead in the game that you're hardly ever home with your significant other/spouse and/or children. And that lack of family union is increasing more and more everyday due to corporate greed. Be that greed for money, or status that can lead to the money.

Well to all those so eager to be in the corporate world, know that it is our God-given human need to show humanity and have family unity, and voiding yourself of it only leads to immense frustration over its being void in your life. A frustration that is most likely clearly on display in that YouTube video. Will you be the next to lose control? If you don't realize what I'm saying here, you just might be.

Behind The Compilation, "Mouth In Action"

So the lyrics say, "A kiss is still a kiss".

I disagree. Especially when you're in doing it in a 69 position with a pornstar that you've lusted for ever since the 1st time you came face to face with him. Well that kiss with Jason Dean from "69 Fuck Street" during that 5-man orgy was my inspiration for the 85 second video clip, "Mouth In Action" that is presently running on my stats and bio page of my website.

One day that 69 kiss with Jason Dean just flash in my mind, then I started to realize, I had some good atypical oral adventures in my movies so far. A 69 kiss, a foot-job on Jake Corwin that leads me up his leg and to his dick, and licking Shorty J's armpits. And while those were things I would never do normally, I had fun doing them. So I decided why not highlight that fun for you guys. While I admit that since licking Shorty J's armpits, I have taken that into my private sex life, in fact I did it this past weekend. The foot-job however - has yet to be repeated, and it probably never will.

Now, let me recall why that 69 kiss with Jason Dean was such a strong motivation in highlighting my atypical oral adventures.

It goes back to when my major crush on Jason Dean started.
I had just won Will Clark's Porn Idol contest in the summer of 2005. The following night, I went to Will's weekly Porno Bingo event, a number of porn actors were there including Kyle Douglas, Jason Dean, Frederick Ford, and Alex Collack (who was a Porn Idol judge and couldn't stop singing my praises during and after the contest). After being introduced to the crowd as the Porn Idol winner, I went to the back of the bar for a bit. Kyle Douglas and Jason Dean were hanging out back there. They congratulated me on my winning Porn Idol, and asked if I was planning on using my win to somehow advance myself into a career in porn. That's when I confessed the fact that I had already done a movie. So Jason Dean asked, "Oh, what movie did you do?"

That's when it happened.
Before that question coming directly from him, my eyes were bouncing back and forth between him and Kyle Douglas, but now they were solely on him. And with my eyes being on him, I noticed his white tank top that fit so well it looked as if the company that made it had him in for a custom fitting session so that it would cover his well-developed chest like a 2nd skin.

I started telling him that I did "Oh Boy Escorts 2" for Tyson Cane Videos, then I caught myself doing what some straight guys do to women with big breast. I was looking at his nipples poking in his tank top like they were his eyes while talking to him. Then I had to tell myself, "Tré? Oh Tré? PICK-YOUR-HEAD-UP!!!!"

When I did "69 FUCK STREET", I had no idea who my scene partners were going to be, but needless to say I was overjoyed to know Jason Dean was coming in to be in one of them. Although, I had never seen any of his movies, so I had no idea if he was a top or bottom (on-camera at least, which at that moment was pertinent info to brighten my day). It turned out being that it was a group scene and he (like me) was a bottom. DAMNIT! I was so hoping that my asshole would get a taste of Jason Dean's cock. Well, my asshole didn't, but my mouth did during the foreplay before and while cameras were rolling.

Once the sex started, while we both were getting fucked, I could sense an opportunity was coming for us to interact. After all, this was Dark Alley Media directing. If you ever seen one of their features, do you really think 5 guys on a bed with 2 pairs fucking isn't going to somehow have the 2 tops and/or the 2 bottoms interacting? I don't think so. So at some point, my head wound up upside down over Jason's and I took full advantage, and that's the kiss you saw in the clip. It started without the cock between us, then again with. Either way, it was mouth action I was more than willing to give, and I hope I'll show you some oral performance in the very near future that show just as much enjoyment on my part.

By the way, based on that kiss, wasn't "69 FUCK STREET" the perfect title? I think so.