Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Write That Down #24

Every individual has a certain body type that they go for. I am well aware of this, and respect it in people. However, they are some body types within certain ethnicities that because of the media, I question whether or not some people's presumed preference is of their own personal nature, OR was it taught to their sub-conscience. It is when I suspect the latter that I don't respect it.

Hence why my latest "Write That Down" quote reads:

When I see Whites, light-skinned Latinos, Asians, etc. go for Blacks guys who are usually tall, dark-skinned, brawny, obvious gym-rats (and often bald), I don't trust them to be individual thinkers. They have to work for that faith in their intellect. My distrust of these non-Blacks' preference is actually because fashion, porn, and other media have so often put the image of these combined traits of a Black male as the only way that dark skin can be seen as beautiful, that it has gotten to the point for me that I can't trust whether a non-Black guy is into this type of Black male on his own, or is it because he has allowed his sub-conscience to be taught to like that type, while his true personal nature prefers more variety in Black males.

This "Write That Down" quote may piss off quite a few non-Blacks. Some I may actually know. But in my usual fashion, I don't give a fuck...and I have no reason to give a fuck, because I'm telling the truth that many non-Blacks (be they your average citizen, or work as photographers, party promoters, porn producers, magazine editors, etc.) who choose that type of Black male over a simply toned physique need to ask themselves that question.
And whether or not they admit it, I'm sure they're scared to take that look at themselves. Why? Because they know that if they do (if the clone-like appearance of these guys from an issue of Next Magazine I commented on are any indication), then as usual....I'LL BE RIGHT!

For the record, I have asked myself whether my liking complexions lighter than my own is of my own design, or by the media. And I will admit, it may have started out partly by the media. BUT after closer examination, I realized that my natural artistic eye is drawn to the color contrast and novelty, as I said in "Write That Down #6". Furthermore, considering the fact that I'm more drawn to tall and slim guys like I said in "In Lust With....Tall & Slim", is even more proof that this preference is of my own design, and not influenced by the media, especially gay media. For tall & slim guys are not what gets the most praise in gay media. We all know that it's lighter complexioned gym-rats who get the most praise.

Lastly, before you try saying that this quote shows me to be cynical, or envious, I'm going to let you in on a fact. A fact that despite all the compliments I have gotten over the years, I have been humble enough to not reveal before. Truth be told....


And I wouldn't changed it to be some buffed up gym-rat to please White American narrow-minded perception of Black beauty for even all the money in the world.


  1. I like what you say at the end! But having read your posts for about a year now, I never once thought that you would ever change who you are! You've always struck me as someone that has been very confident and proud of yourself (as YOU should be, as WE all should be!) just as you are. I guess I never thought about the media's influence on my own preference. But I've dated every height from 5' 3" to 6'3" and every color of the beautiful human rainbow.
    But I have to be honest and say that I never really think about the variations of skin tone- light, medium, or dark, on a black man. This conversation is usually met with some skepticism from my black friends and I have never understood that. But I don't think it's something I notice much with any race really. There are different complexions in all of them. I know when someone's skin looks radiant and healthy, that turns me on, but I don't tend to catagorize the tone. Does that make me unusual? Do most people think that way? I think that I am not influenced by the media as much as I am a body of work. When I see a model, either in porn or print/media, that has a diverse portfolio or a certain character to their expressions that excites me and makes me want to know more about them. I will hunt down more movies or layouts about them. I like watching the way they talk and their body language. I think for me skin color is secondary to that.

  2. For the record, I wanted to state that Ryan, the gentleman in the fedora, is a good guy, and nobody's "clone" like you alluded to. Without revealing the details of his back-story, he's come a long way from being teased as a HS freshman for being chubby & unpopular. He worked hard to attain his good frame, and was one of my close confidants in school when most others turned me away for being "weird," listening to my tales of social woe and giving me advice whenever I asked. I'd venture to say that in this stage of his life, he's simply reaping the fruits of his hard work to become a better person, inside & out. Whether or not that is reflected in this publication is to be determined, but I have to speak up about using his photograph specifically because from a personal standpoint, his personality & kindness are a complete 180 from what his current physique would imply about his character (e.g. snotty, standoffish, etc.)

    Just wanted you to know.

  3. Joey,

    What you say about Ryan's character is all well and good. But I stand by my original statement about his LOOKS being clone-like, because it is an EXTREMELY COMMON look among Black males looking to be physically admired. The photo to the left makes that obvious - 3 muscular Black guys, ALL of them BALD. They couldn't find a Black guy with a nice physique with HAIR? And why did Ryan, any of the other guys in that picture, and most Blacks with that build shave their heads? Maybe they are complying to an image expected of them in the vein of what I said in "Write That Down #26".

    This blog post was not attacking the part of the character that you are defending in your comment. This blog post was addressing an observation that there may be signs in his character showing how that insecure teenager is still lingering. An emotion that I myself am not immune to, so I'm not talking about what I don't know.

  4. Tre:

    Touche, and well said. I think all of us make serious life-choices based on the traumatic experiences of our adolescence (I deign to say 'teenage years' because some of us don't really go through that 2-5 year maturity stage until well after college, but still...). The point of that statement is I would like to think Ryan is intelligent enough to co-sign your statement in "#26." I do agree, however, that there most certainly is a stigma attached to visualizing the GBT Black American male in a way that is "easier to take" for a "mainstream" audience. Is there a solution to breaking that stigma? I'm not sure, and I definitely don't have an answer to that question, as it usually turns into a circle-debate anyway. But thanks for clarifying, I appreciate it.


I HIGHLY respect those willing to stand behind their comments with a name. So if you use "Anonymous" on a viewpoint that challenges mine, IT WILL BE DELETED. For your cowardice to not show yourself makes your viewpoint and you irrelevant.

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