Wednesday, October 9, 2019

Sex Personified

What makes a man "sex personified"?

Well, before I give my answer, to prove that my including myself in the above collage is not me being arrogant thinking I'm all that, let me recall what happened to me to make me consider the reality of such a thing, and start seeing it in others.

Way back when the NYC gay bar/club Splash was around, one night I was as usual, dancing alone. Still celebrating my being out. It might have been about a year before I got into porn. Anyway, this cute European guy comes to the dancefloor with 2 females. As much as I wanted to stare and hopefully make eye contact, I didn't try because he was with the 2 females.

You see, I don't try to court guys at a bar/club known for hook-ups when I know they are with friends. That's because it is often the case that they are either looking out for the friends, or following the lead of the friends. Which in turn makes those friends become the biggest cock-blockers. And this instance might not have been any different.

For as I said, I was dancing all by myself. He was with the females about 4 - 6 ft. away. Then my peripheral vision saw him starting to approach me. I was hoping that this was him making the 1st move. Once he got right by me, I turned to look directly at him. He then initiated speaking by saying...

"YOU ARE SEX! You're like,...", while looking me up and down as in awe, he concluded by saying, "...the whole thing! You are just so beautiful. I had to say that to you."

I smiled and thanked him, and then he just simply turned around and went back to the 2 females he came in with. Never saying another word to me. So I'm left standing there thinking, "Uh,... what the fuck just happened?"

Because he left me so bewildered, I never took what he said to heart. I just thought of him as a drunk Euro boy who made himself dismissable by being drunk. Then things started to happen in my life to make me more aware of my sex appeal. Things that made me have to wonder... why did he just break from his group like that, say those words to me, then walk away? In his eyes, was my beauty, or my aura that striking that it compelled him to do that? If there is any truth to the saying, "a drunk man's words are a sober man's truth", then the answer is YES. And there have been numerous instances since confirming it.

Such as while I was an extra on Michael Lucas' "Dangerous Liaisons", some of the pornstars kept looking over at me. I was standing far enough away from people that there was no way to confuse myself as to where they were looking, or who they were looking at.... Except maybe behind me. So I turned around to look. All to have to say to myself, "Nope, no one there. So their eyes are on YOU!"

Or as I wrote a few years ago about how I'll go to sex parties where all the guys there are being wallflowers. However, when I finally find someone to my liking, and have sex with them, then the wallflowers stop being wallflowers. To the extent that I have witnessed guys who were wallflowers simultaneously when I arrived start having sex with each other.

And even today, I will get on the bus or train, and walk in the door to see sometimes males, sometimes females, and sometimes both... stop and stare at me in adoration. Or see a guy being arm and arm with his girlfriend or wife. As I'm in my spot listening to music, reading a book, or just being to my thoughts, I'll suddenly feel eyes on me. Then in my peripheral vision, I'll discover that those eyes on me... are from the guy from the straight couple.

He'll be looking me up and down. Making a full assessment of me from head to toe. Then out of guilt, start a public display of affection with his female partner. OR his woman will start some PDA knowing good and darn well that she'll never confront him about checking out a man.

As stated before, this is not me being arrogant. This is just me being observant of people's actions around me, and when I've unsuspectedly have become involved in those actions. Plus, if I was arrogant about this, I wouldn't me willing to admit and admire that there are others who seem to have that same kind of presence.

The presence that makes a man (or woman) sex personified. Someone having a sexual aura that makes sexuality come to the forefront of many minds as soon as that person walks into a space. Consuming the admirer to the point that the admirer considers crossing their taught boundaries of color, ethnic preference, or even their degree of straight or gay.

It is a reality, and that is where the poem "Sex Personified" is born from.

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